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> ...Some people feel incredibly angry at it, as someone in their life almost forced them into using it when they didn't want to. This is a really good point,

> ...Some people feel incredibly angry at it, as someone in their life almost forced them into using it when they didn't want to. This is a really good point, and it's an angle I didn't honestly consider. NVC is a goddamn superpower for dealing with people who are being difficult... I guess it makes sense that there are people who have been on the receiving end, and couldn't get their own needs met. I'm really glad we both participated in this discussion... Really nice to get an eye-opener like this.

jimkleiber 5y ago
>I guess it makes sense that there are people who have been on the receiving end, and couldn't get their own needs met. I've run into similar challenges with those three steps I talked about. I haven't been deeply steeped in NVC so I may have it wrong—my impression is that it doesn't do step 2 very well, or articulating how I imagine the other person is feeling. Often it seems to leave that part to a question, requesting the other person answer what they need and often, people can't answer it or don't want to. While basic questions, I find they challenge me and many others: how do I feel, what do I want, what do I need? So with NVC, I think it almost requires the other person to answer that and get into a dialogue about what both people need and if the one person doesn't know or doesn't want to, it can almost become a standstill and then lead to more frustation..."I'm saying what I need, I need you to say what you need. What do you need???"