Go easy on yourself and don't compare yourself to other people. That old classic saw "be yourself", springs to mind, but it's important to enjoy yourself too.

Go easy on yourself and don't compare yourself to other people. That old classic saw "be yourself", springs to mind, but it's important to enjoy yourself too. You are anything but shallow if you can think and write as you do. I've read your other comments on this site from 2015. I come from a Christian equivalent in some ways. Some things that have helped me, in no particular order are, but many smart people have recommended are: Read Philosopy, join a charity (I reckon you'd be an excellent helper in after school educational activities), take up more than one sport and join a sports club, chess, make more art, change your diet, get more sleep. I can't speak to your mental condition or medication because that requires expertise but you can always, and indeed should always, get a second opinion and seek to alter your medication under supervision. Trite on this forum, but emacs org-mode is a great thing to learn and might help using any available empty slots on your schedule, it's also great fun, such a total cultural immersion. Org-mode with magit and babel et cetera is for me the most powerful documentation system available, and most open source projects need to improve their documentation. Maybe try to use your considerable talent, skills, and experience to help your favorite digital community? Stare out of the window more! It's an amazing thing to do, so contemplative and calming. Take time with yourself. You're a human and being human is truly wonderful.