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The unegotistical, realistic, quiet, but firm self-confidence you’re describing seems to me to be exactly what the author’s labelling “swagger.” Is this maybe

The unegotistical, realistic, quiet, but firm self-confidence you’re describing seems to me to be exactly what the author’s labelling “swagger.” Is this maybe just a terminology quibble? > What is swagger? For me, it's knowing what you're good at and acting accordingly — earned confidence. But it's not arrogance. Your behavior and ability are in lock step. > Be assertive and opinionated even when you aren't as sure. Go back to having strong beliefs. Know your beliefs. Hold onto them. > Don’t be an asshole about it, but push for what you need and don’t give in to every request. Separately, and speaking as a current manager: the last thing I want is for the people on my team to just blithely go along, “just following orders,” if (when, and probably frequently) I’m asking for something shortsighted, ill-considered, or just plain stupid. I crave feedback from the talented experts on my team because it helps make sure we’re not suffering from blind spots, silos, or echo chambers. Like you’re saying: experience has taught me that I always have something to learn.

ChrisMarshallNY 5y ago
You are correct. I just don't like the term "swagger." Like I said, I really appreciated the article, and its tone. It's just that words matter. In my experience, many folks run with the first dictionary listing, and ignore any nuances. https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/swagger https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/swagger I prefer "confidence." https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/confidence https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/confidence And, to your second point, one of the reasons that I was a good manager, was because I actively solicited and valued pushback from my employees. This was seldom a luxury that I was given, by my superiors. And, as a "gentleman of a certain age," I'll lay odds that a big reason for ageism in tech, is because most tech managers don't want to hire people that may have the ability, backbone, and judgment to push back on badly-formed strategies. I managed a "tiger team" of experienced C++ engineers. I had to pay attention to them, and treat them with respect.
- simonbarker87 5y ago
  This is something that military officer training (at least in the UK) teaches very well. You may have a degree and have gone to Sandhurst but woe betide any junior office who doesn’t listen to their experienced NCOs.

ChrisMarshallNY 5y ago

You are correct. I just don't like the term "swagger." Like I said, I really appreciated the article, and its tone. It's just that words matter. In my experience, many folks run with the first dictionary listing, and ignore any nuances. https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/swagger https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/swagger I prefer "confidence." https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/confidence https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/confidence And, to your second point, one of the reasons that I was a good manager, was because I actively solicited and valued pushback from my employees. This was seldom a luxury that I was given, by my superiors. And, as a "gentleman of a certain age," I'll lay odds that a big reason for ageism in tech, is because most tech managers don't want to hire people that may have the ability, backbone, and judgment to push back on badly-formed strategies. I managed a "tiger team" of experienced C++ engineers. I had to pay attention to them, and treat them with respect.

simonbarker87 5y ago
This is something that military officer training (at least in the UK) teaches very well. You may have a degree and have gone to Sandhurst but woe betide any junior office who doesn’t listen to their experienced NCOs.