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I hear myself in you. I went through some shit. But I have two kids and so I would never... Then I got a little better and those daily thoughts became weekly,

I hear myself in you. I went through some shit. But I have two kids and so I would never... Then I got a little better and those daily thoughts became weekly, then monthly and nowadays they are simply not there anymore. Well, sometimes they are but they are now very easily dismissed. I just came here to say that, if god forbid both your kids are taken from you, even then, I would say to you, fucking hell man, don't do it. Your loss will crush you and you'll never be the same. But you'd be alive. And you'd get to see how you'd deal with such a loss. And you wouldn't be alone. Because this shit happens to people and with some support, they live through it. Anyways, I'm glad you find such joy in being a father. Isn't it great?

cyberpunk 5y ago
I mean, I'm a buddhist.. So I'm kind of 'pro universe' but I don't see the point in unnecessary suffering. You're telling me you'd keep on going after losing your family? Years and years of pain and misery? What's the point? There are some things you don't get over.. And even the idea of 'getting over' something like that would make me even sadder than I would have been immediately? Sometimes, kill -9 seems to be a valid option to me, all I'm saying.. (In a responsible way, get your stuff in order, do it in a clinic, etc etc etc)
- kreeben 5y ago
  I'm telling you that I _hope_ I would find a way to go on and that I truly hope you would, too. Yes, your life is now empty. But people have their lives ripped apart, all, the fucking, time. Some of them go on living rich and fruitful lives. I would like to think I could strive to become such a person. The pain a suicidal person feels is like nothing else. I hope that after years of mourning I would pick myself up and feel that pain to its fullest and become an expert pain feeler, because those were the cards that were dealt to me. And I hope that I would find some meaning, again. However, if I find that I have lung cancer and will inevitably drown in my own mucus, I'm pretty sure about the bullet through my head. Yay, rainbows! Heavy shit, this.
  - cyberpunk 5y ago
    Yep it's brutal. Maybe we just ignore it until it happens. Seems to be a time tested approach ;)
- downut 5y ago
  Search string: life is suffering People have been thinking on this very question since the beginning of people.
  - cyberpunk 5y ago
    Well, I kind of identify with the soto sect of Zen Buddhism, but I actually reject the standard interpretation of the four noble truths (the first if which, as you've said: life is suffering). Life isn't all suffering. Idealistic thinking of life is a kind of suffering, I suppose, but you're not suffering all the time. When you're eating an awesome meal, having some hot sex, seeing your code pass CI on the first attempt, yada -- this is not life is suffering. So I can't agree with the core buddhist noble truths.. If you're invested in another take on them, I would seek out Gudo Nishijimas dharma airs :}
    - downut 5y ago
      Ah, well I had no intention of implying that all of life is suffering, but the succinctness of my comment can be read that way, sorry. Your take is quite reasonable, IMHO. The gist of a lot of the quotes that search brings up is more or less the same: without suffering, it may be more difficult to understand how deeply good the pleasant experiences of life are. Which for me, would include looking out the window at the rain. (I live in a desert.) My best friend (lives in Belgium) thinks the opposite.
      - cyberpunk 5y ago
        Oh, your friend in Belgium doesn't appreciate what he has, I come from a small island off the west coast of Scotland, where rain is rather common... You could resent it, or you could install roof windows, a log burner and invest on a decent whisky and have the best possible environment for getting deep into a hardback book that possible exists (possible enhanced by a collie dog laying on your feet). Life is weird. We're all islands until we realise we are the island. Don't take anything too seriously. :)
        5y ago

cyberpunk 5y ago

I mean, I'm a buddhist.. So I'm kind of 'pro universe' but I don't see the point in unnecessary suffering. You're telling me you'd keep on going after losing your family? Years and years of pain and misery? What's the point? There are some things you don't get over.. And even the idea of 'getting over' something like that would make me even sadder than I would have been immediately? Sometimes, kill -9 seems to be a valid option to me, all I'm saying.. (In a responsible way, get your stuff in order, do it in a clinic, etc etc etc)

kreeben 5y ago
I'm telling you that I _hope_ I would find a way to go on and that I truly hope you would, too. Yes, your life is now empty. But people have their lives ripped apart, all, the fucking, time. Some of them go on living rich and fruitful lives. I would like to think I could strive to become such a person. The pain a suicidal person feels is like nothing else. I hope that after years of mourning I would pick myself up and feel that pain to its fullest and become an expert pain feeler, because those were the cards that were dealt to me. And I hope that I would find some meaning, again. However, if I find that I have lung cancer and will inevitably drown in my own mucus, I'm pretty sure about the bullet through my head. Yay, rainbows! Heavy shit, this.
- cyberpunk 5y ago
  Yep it's brutal. Maybe we just ignore it until it happens. Seems to be a time tested approach ;)
downut 5y ago
Search string: life is suffering People have been thinking on this very question since the beginning of people.
- cyberpunk 5y ago
  Well, I kind of identify with the soto sect of Zen Buddhism, but I actually reject the standard interpretation of the four noble truths (the first if which, as you've said: life is suffering). Life isn't all suffering. Idealistic thinking of life is a kind of suffering, I suppose, but you're not suffering all the time. When you're eating an awesome meal, having some hot sex, seeing your code pass CI on the first attempt, yada -- this is not life is suffering. So I can't agree with the core buddhist noble truths.. If you're invested in another take on them, I would seek out Gudo Nishijimas dharma airs :}
  - downut 5y ago
    Ah, well I had no intention of implying that all of life is suffering, but the succinctness of my comment can be read that way, sorry. Your take is quite reasonable, IMHO. The gist of a lot of the quotes that search brings up is more or less the same: without suffering, it may be more difficult to understand how deeply good the pleasant experiences of life are. Which for me, would include looking out the window at the rain. (I live in a desert.) My best friend (lives in Belgium) thinks the opposite.
    - cyberpunk 5y ago
      Oh, your friend in Belgium doesn't appreciate what he has, I come from a small island off the west coast of Scotland, where rain is rather common... You could resent it, or you could install roof windows, a log burner and invest on a decent whisky and have the best possible environment for getting deep into a hardback book that possible exists (possible enhanced by a collie dog laying on your feet). Life is weird. We're all islands until we realise we are the island. Don't take anything too seriously. :)
      - 5y ago