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I wonder if there is a bit of survivorship bias in this article. Some kids grow up in a non-friendly environment, but develop the skills to deal with the advers
by bxparks 5y ago
I wonder if there is a bit of survivorship bias in this article. Some kids grow up in a non-friendly environment, but develop the skills to deal with the adversity, and when they grow up, those skills become highly advantageous. Other kids whither and fall apart in such an adverse environment, suffer from low self-esteem, substance abuse, and other mental illnesses, and never get the chance to reap the benefits of being an outsider.
- 8ytecoder 5y agoIndeed. And I have seen cases of both happening within the same single family. Different kids react to the same external pressure in different ways.
- kayodelycaon 5y agoI think there is. I think they are just speaking from their own experience. They are an authority on their own life experience and know what they've learned but that doesn't generalize. Advice is only right for the right person at the right time. > The best way to be liked is to just agree with everyone. This view is incomplete. Human relationships are build on connections. You can create those connections by agreeing with people, but that creates a very swallow connection. An example of connections is networking: you mingle in a group of people at an event and start or join conversations. Everyone at the event starts the shared experience of being there. After a conversation, you might find someone that works in the same city you do, that adds another connection. And so on. :)
- WalterBright 5y ago> The best way to be liked is to just agree with everyone. Maybe I'm different, but people who just agree with me are uninteresting.
- throwaway803453 5y agoAs are people who are impulsively contrarian.
- fragmede 5y agoI think you're totally wrong!
- WalterBright 5y agoHmm, I like the cut of your jib!
- dTal 5y agoPerhaps it could be rephrased: The best way to avoid being disliked is to be uninteresting.
- sqldba 5y agoYeah I mean for starters the author appear to have been rich as hell from the very beginning. I’m sure that helps soothe the sting of being an “outsider”. But I decided not to take the article personally because they’re not claiming something universal about outsiders.
- bobthechef 5y agoHe wrote that he wasn't rich.
- Aloha 5y agoI'm one of those people, being the odd man out, has both harmed me and allowed me to reap benefits. I can walk into most situations as the dispassionate observer, its really interesting being able to watch the world and understand which rules matter, and which ones don't.