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I was depressed for years due to two things: a bad relationship and bad jobs. Once I moved on from the hoarder ex with 3 un-treated mental health problems, who
by WhompingWindows 5y ago
I was depressed for years due to two things: a bad relationship and bad jobs.
Once I moved on from the hoarder ex with 3 un-treated mental health problems, whose clothes literally covered the entire bedroom, floor and bed and all surfaces, well damn: I was a lot less depressed! Imagine a 1500 sqft apartment where 90% of the possessions are not yours, where if you see a piece of her garbage and toss it out, she'll get mad at you, even if it's a rotting, blackened orange peel. This sort of toxic relationship has to end, do not cling, do not "care for them" if they refuse professional help. This will sap your energy, it will sap your life, and you'll become depressed, unable to muster the energy to "fix" them or to leave the relationship. It was only when she went away for 3 months one summer, and I was marvelously not depressed and I didn't miss her one jot, I knew it had to end when she returned.
On top of that, I was in high-stress teaching jobs, $11/hr with no benefits in inner-city schools: this was important and impactful work, but brutal on the self. We actually got called racists by a very rowdy student, who wasn't allowed to jump on the desk and scream "I LOVE TACOS!" I'm not kidding, he called us racist for not allowing that. Never-mind the constant fights, religious students telling me science is fake, or having 35 kids in a tiny classroom. Teaching is a very important and undervalued field.
Once I actually got a $30/hr job with benefits and gained my freedom from toxic relations, suddenly I was the happiest I'd ever been. Add onto that, being in a relationship with a good match, with someone who had no undiagnosed/untreated mental health problems.
- podgaj 5y ago> I was depressed for years due to two things: a bad relationship and bad jobs. That is sadness, not depression. It is a mistake so many people are making in this thread. COVID lockdown made you sad, not depressed. https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-squeaky-wheel/201510/the-important-difference-between-sadness-and-depression https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-squeaky-wheel/20...
- WhompingWindows 5y agoWell friend, I'm sorry to say your comments were hurtful to me. Do you really think an internet comment I scribbled out in 2 minutes is enough to un-diagnose me? Do you think someone diagnosed with depression by both an MD and a psychiatrist doesn't know the difference between sadness and a disorder? First, I didn't mention COVID lockdown, this relationship and job occurred in the mid 2010's, long before COVID. Second, depression is a family illness on both sides for me. I experienced a lot of bad times, went to an MD and a psychiatrist, both of whom diagnosed me with mild depression. I wasn't a severe case, maybe you're conflating mild depression vs. severe depression. My friend, just take a deep breath and ask yourself: have you clinically interviewed me? Are you a psychiatrist? If not, you really can't say whether or not I have had depression or not, you have no data to make any claims.
- procinct 5y agoWouldn’t it be more defined as “situational depression”? https://www.healthline.com/health/depression/situational-depression https://www.healthline.com/health/depression/situational-dep...
- robocat 5y agoYou are telling other people that their subjective experiences are wrong, which is just rude. Point-blank correcting anyone’s personal experience, regardless how much you might disagree with it, is usually found to be very offensive. If you are trying to correct someone’s usage of words, please try to be a lot more thoughtful about how you approach that. Different people use words differently, and you are not the arbiter of truth. To agree with OP: I was in a bad situation, and was diagnosed by a nurse as clinically depressed. I fixed the situation, and I was happy again. [edit: changed order]
- podgaj 5y agoBeing sad is like being depressed, but the causes are different. That’s what’s important. And if you were diagnosed by a “nurse” as clinically depressed I would say you are probably suffering from situational depression, or sadness in other words. And Nurses shouldn’t be Diagnosing mood disorders. That’s my point, depression is a mood disorder, sadness is not. Neither is situational depression. You don’t treat situational depression with anti-depressants.
- robocat 5y agoThere you go, doing it again, ramming your definition of words down someone else’s throat. And you know nothing about me, or the nurse, so quit making glib judgements.
- podgaj 5y agoI’m not blaming them down your throat I’m having a discussion about them. Did you ever think for a moment that you were wrong? I’ve been going to therapists for 20 years, I’ve suffered mental illness for 45 years. If you met you had a psychiatric nurse practitioner you should say that, because a nurse is an overly broad generalization.
- WhompingWindows 5y agoI was diagnosed by both my PCP MD and a psychiatrist. Do you think you're more qualified than they are? Have you clinically interviewed me?