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"Don't treat any question as 'stupid.'" There definitely are stupid question that shows the person asking them was too lazy to think for a moment or at least g

"Don't treat any question as 'stupid.'" There definitely are stupid question that shows the person asking them was too lazy to think for a moment or at least google it. If people do not value my time, they are not worthy of it. But yes, it is important to seperate that from beginners question, as it is easy to forget, that we all started as beginners.

ChrisMarshallNY 5y ago
I’d say that a significant number of folks in this industry seem to have severe self-image issues, and get some kind of balm from attacking/looking down on the work of others. As the recipient of a great deal of this behavior (see “I ask ‘stupid’ questions all the time,” above), I think that it’s better to say “this is why we can’t have nice things,” and simply cover all my bases by not attacking others. It’s quite easy to say “no,” in a way that does not cast shame or judgment onto others. If someone asks a question I can easily answer; even if they are being “lazy” (which I believe to be an overused, and misunderstood word), or even trolling, I answer it in good faith. If I don’t have time, I say “I’m not able to answer that, right now,” or simply ignore it, if I can do so, in a way that does not come across as judgmental. Easy-peasey. That way, I don’t make enemies quickly. If someone perceives me as a “soft touch,” or as an easy place to get answers, that’s not actually a bad thing. As we get older, we discover that making friends, and not making enemies, is a lot more important than being perceived as “superior.” Relationships may be the single most valuable artifact of our lives. I’m a good friend to have. I always find it fascinating, how so many folks start our relationship out by quickly judging me (negatively, of course), and attacking me. They've never had any contact with me before, and their very first interaction with me is an insult or attack (quite frequently, landing wide of the mark). I consider that to be rather self-destructive behavior. I try not to do that to others.
- hutzlibu 5y ago
  "If someone asks a question I can easily answer; even if they are being “lazy” (which I believe to be an overused, and misunderstood word), or even trolling, I answer it in good faith. If I don’t have time, I say “I’m not able to answer that, right now,” or simply ignore it, if I can do so, in a way that does not come across as judgmental." That is a nice habit, but I actually think I have the right to sometimes answer in a judgmental way, to honestly communicate my emotions about the topic (time wasting). And I found out, that this can work, too. But yes, if I am particulary annoyed, that can also lead to other people getting afraid to ask me anything at some point and rather continue do something stupid.
  - ChrisMarshallNY 5y ago
    Oh, I have the right (and linguistic skill) to be dick majuere. But, like so many of these “rights,” I should also expect to be held to account, and suffer consequences, for exercising said “right.” If people see me being cooperative, helpful, and a source of good information, they will develop one type of opinion of me. If they see me as prickly, judgmental, arrogant, and pugilistic, then they will develop another type of opinion of me. Depending on who is developing that opinion, the consequences (and rewards) to me can be quite significant.
    - hutzlibu 5y ago
      "If people see me being cooperative, helpful, and a source of good information, they will develop one type of opinion of me." Yes, and sometimes that opinion might be: "this is the idiot who does all the work for you, if I just ask him". That would be a significant consequence for you. I do not know you, nor if you have ever been in that situation, but I've known too many helpful people getting exploited this way - and I have choosen to not try to exploit, nor be exploited.
      - ChrisMarshallNY 5y ago
        > "this is the idiot who does all the work for you, if I just ask him" Hasn't been a problem for me, so far (and it's been around 35 years). Learning how to respectfully say "no" is an important life skill. Pays dividends way beyond just not being treated as the office Wikipedia. We seem to have unrealistically low opinions of our peers. I don't know if I've ever worked with anyone that has wanted me (or anyone else) to do their work for them. I have known a number of folks that were "in over their heads," and tried to hide the fact, but it never lasted too long. I guess I've been fortunate.
Igelau 5y ago
> There definitely are stupid question that shows the person asking them was too lazy to think for a moment or at least google it. Even this is rare. If you're getting too many "now what? now what?" questions in a row when the answer is literally right there, yeah, that's annoying. So much of the time I find it's just one of those things where people's cognition works completely differently. They might have thought really hard about it but were barking up the wrong tree. Or they might not have even known what the right search terms were for the problem. How many times have you searched for something and the highest ranking result is from StackOverflow, but the thread says "this question is closed because it's a duplicate" or "this question is closed because it's a tools question and off-topic". These are obviously valuable questions as indicated by their search ranking, but the collective acts like they are dumb questions or like someone isn't paying attention.
- hutzlibu 5y ago
  "They might have thought really hard about it but were barking up the wrong tree. Or they might not have even known what the right search terms were for the problem." Sure. Then it still might be a stupid question, but one worth answering. I know that I ask stupid question at times.

ChrisMarshallNY 5y ago

I’d say that a significant number of folks in this industry seem to have severe self-image issues, and get some kind of balm from attacking/looking down on the work of others. As the recipient of a great deal of this behavior (see “I ask ‘stupid’ questions all the time,” above), I think that it’s better to say “this is why we can’t have nice things,” and simply cover all my bases by not attacking others. It’s quite easy to say “no,” in a way that does not cast shame or judgment onto others. If someone asks a question I can easily answer; even if they are being “lazy” (which I believe to be an overused, and misunderstood word), or even trolling, I answer it in good faith. If I don’t have time, I say “I’m not able to answer that, right now,” or simply ignore it, if I can do so, in a way that does not come across as judgmental. Easy-peasey. That way, I don’t make enemies quickly. If someone perceives me as a “soft touch,” or as an easy place to get answers, that’s not actually a bad thing. As we get older, we discover that making friends, and not making enemies, is a lot more important than being perceived as “superior.” Relationships may be the single most valuable artifact of our lives. I’m a good friend to have. I always find it fascinating, how so many folks start our relationship out by quickly judging me (negatively, of course), and attacking me. They've never had any contact with me before, and their very first interaction with me is an insult or attack (quite frequently, landing wide of the mark). I consider that to be rather self-destructive behavior. I try not to do that to others.

hutzlibu 5y ago
"If someone asks a question I can easily answer; even if they are being “lazy” (which I believe to be an overused, and misunderstood word), or even trolling, I answer it in good faith. If I don’t have time, I say “I’m not able to answer that, right now,” or simply ignore it, if I can do so, in a way that does not come across as judgmental." That is a nice habit, but I actually think I have the right to sometimes answer in a judgmental way, to honestly communicate my emotions about the topic (time wasting). And I found out, that this can work, too. But yes, if I am particulary annoyed, that can also lead to other people getting afraid to ask me anything at some point and rather continue do something stupid.
- ChrisMarshallNY 5y ago
  Oh, I have the right (and linguistic skill) to be dick majuere. But, like so many of these “rights,” I should also expect to be held to account, and suffer consequences, for exercising said “right.” If people see me being cooperative, helpful, and a source of good information, they will develop one type of opinion of me. If they see me as prickly, judgmental, arrogant, and pugilistic, then they will develop another type of opinion of me. Depending on who is developing that opinion, the consequences (and rewards) to me can be quite significant.
  - hutzlibu 5y ago
    "If people see me being cooperative, helpful, and a source of good information, they will develop one type of opinion of me." Yes, and sometimes that opinion might be: "this is the idiot who does all the work for you, if I just ask him". That would be a significant consequence for you. I do not know you, nor if you have ever been in that situation, but I've known too many helpful people getting exploited this way - and I have choosen to not try to exploit, nor be exploited.
    - ChrisMarshallNY 5y ago
      > "this is the idiot who does all the work for you, if I just ask him" Hasn't been a problem for me, so far (and it's been around 35 years). Learning how to respectfully say "no" is an important life skill. Pays dividends way beyond just not being treated as the office Wikipedia. We seem to have unrealistically low opinions of our peers. I don't know if I've ever worked with anyone that has wanted me (or anyone else) to do their work for them. I have known a number of folks that were "in over their heads," and tried to hide the fact, but it never lasted too long. I guess I've been fortunate.

Igelau 5y ago

> There definitely are stupid question that shows the person asking them was too lazy to think for a moment or at least google it. Even this is rare. If you're getting too many "now what? now what?" questions in a row when the answer is literally right there, yeah, that's annoying. So much of the time I find it's just one of those things where people's cognition works completely differently. They might have thought really hard about it but were barking up the wrong tree. Or they might not have even known what the right search terms were for the problem. How many times have you searched for something and the highest ranking result is from StackOverflow, but the thread says "this question is closed because it's a duplicate" or "this question is closed because it's a tools question and off-topic". These are obviously valuable questions as indicated by their search ranking, but the collective acts like they are dumb questions or like someone isn't paying attention.

hutzlibu 5y ago
"They might have thought really hard about it but were barking up the wrong tree. Or they might not have even known what the right search terms were for the problem." Sure. Then it still might be a stupid question, but one worth answering. I know that I ask stupid question at times.