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Tons of comments here agreeing that this kind of vague messaging is to be avoided (and I'll toss my comment in there as also being in agreement). But....clearl

Tons of comments here agreeing that this kind of vague messaging is to be avoided (and I'll toss my comment in there as also being in agreement). But....clearly there are people out there who use this kind of communicaton, some of them doubtlessly reading this thread. So my question is: those who do say vagaries like "let's talk when you have a minute* - why? What is your intention?

ethbr0 5y ago
I think the best intention version of it is "I need more time to have this conversation in nuance, but I don't have that time right now." When IMHO, it's better just to carry secret water as the manager in those circumstances, and have the conversation when you have time to have it. The key to avoiding spooky messaging is asking "How is the person I'm saying this to going to receive it?" and "What good is going to come from their knowing what I'm going to tell them, between now and the actual conversation?" Sometimes it's important! Like "Do it this way ASAP, we'll talk about why later." But in the meh version the person cannot do anything productive with "We should talk later." And in the worse version, they're worrying about it.
Izkata 5y ago
As someone who isn't a manager but has used similar phrases on occasion, it's short for: * I know I'm interrupting so you don't have to act on this immediately. * I also don't want to be overheard (in my case I didn't want the family member I was using it with to share something if they were with friends), so the message doesn't let on what the conversation will be about. * Hopefully it won't be a long conversation. I don't know if I've just gotten lucky or something, but even in a work context "let's talk when you have a minute" doesn't bother me. It and variations have been used a few times, and it's always been neutral or positive - a manager I don't have regular conversations with wants an update on something big they know I'm working on, my immediate manager wants to tell me about an upcoming project and if I can take it on/put aside current stuff to do it (and it's urgent enough it can't wait until our normal 1-on-1), stuff like that.
- Ansil849 5y ago
  > and it's always been neutral or positive - a manager I don't have regular conversations with wants an update on something big they know I'm working on, my immediate manager wants to tell me about an upcoming project and if I can take it on/put aside current stuff to do it (and it's urgent enough it can't wait until our normal 1-on-1), stuff like that. Yes, it usually is. But the whole point of avoiding phrases like this is that the person does not know this beforehand, which can put them in a state of uncertainty. It's not at al difficult to just say "hey, can I get an update on your project" in your example.
deleted 5y ago
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mavelikara 5y ago
Multiple others have commented on this already here, but I will chime in. The intent is to deliver a message in person over a synchronous communication. In many cases, dropping a message over Slack, text, or email, does not feel fair to the other person. For example, "Hey, I need to talk about my departure from the team when you have a minute".
xyzelement 5y ago
> "let's talk when you have a minute* - why? What is your intention? Well - you're busy, they are busy - you need a moment of their time at their convenience and you're asking for it. Although I've learned to add context or just jokingly say "nobody's getting fired" which does relieve the tension.
- musicale 5y ago
  > jokingly say "nobody's getting fired" Nobody except you that is, haha! Oh how I crack myself up.

ethbr0 5y ago

I think the best intention version of it is "I need more time to have this conversation in nuance, but I don't have that time right now." When IMHO, it's better just to carry secret water as the manager in those circumstances, and have the conversation when you have time to have it. The key to avoiding spooky messaging is asking "How is the person I'm saying this to going to receive it?" and "What good is going to come from their knowing what I'm going to tell them, between now and the actual conversation?" Sometimes it's important! Like "Do it this way ASAP, we'll talk about why later." But in the meh version the person cannot do anything productive with "We should talk later." And in the worse version, they're worrying about it.

Izkata 5y ago

As someone who isn't a manager but has used similar phrases on occasion, it's short for: * I know I'm interrupting so you don't have to act on this immediately. * I also don't want to be overheard (in my case I didn't want the family member I was using it with to share something if they were with friends), so the message doesn't let on what the conversation will be about. * Hopefully it won't be a long conversation. I don't know if I've just gotten lucky or something, but even in a work context "let's talk when you have a minute" doesn't bother me. It and variations have been used a few times, and it's always been neutral or positive - a manager I don't have regular conversations with wants an update on something big they know I'm working on, my immediate manager wants to tell me about an upcoming project and if I can take it on/put aside current stuff to do it (and it's urgent enough it can't wait until our normal 1-on-1), stuff like that.

Ansil849 5y ago
> and it's always been neutral or positive - a manager I don't have regular conversations with wants an update on something big they know I'm working on, my immediate manager wants to tell me about an upcoming project and if I can take it on/put aside current stuff to do it (and it's urgent enough it can't wait until our normal 1-on-1), stuff like that. Yes, it usually is. But the whole point of avoiding phrases like this is that the person does not know this beforehand, which can put them in a state of uncertainty. It's not at al difficult to just say "hey, can I get an update on your project" in your example.

deleted 5y ago

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mavelikara 5y ago

Multiple others have commented on this already here, but I will chime in. The intent is to deliver a message in person over a synchronous communication. In many cases, dropping a message over Slack, text, or email, does not feel fair to the other person. For example, "Hey, I need to talk about my departure from the team when you have a minute".

xyzelement 5y ago

> "let's talk when you have a minute* - why? What is your intention? Well - you're busy, they are busy - you need a moment of their time at their convenience and you're asking for it. Although I've learned to add context or just jokingly say "nobody's getting fired" which does relieve the tension.

musicale 5y ago
> jokingly say "nobody's getting fired" Nobody except you that is, haha! Oh how I crack myself up.