I realized that what I thought was 'reality' was just an internal render i.e an artifact of a bunch of sensory input being processed. I decided to study my own

I realized that what I thought was 'reality' was just an internal render i.e an artifact of a bunch of sensory input being processed. I decided to study my own mind using mindfulness meditation and self reflection. What I found was the following: - If I am focusing on negative things my subconscious mind will feed me negative thoughts and emotions. - My subconscious mind runs wild but it will often give me what I ask of it if I clearly express what I want in a definitive, firm and polite manner. - Negativity is a viewpoint and all viewpoints can be changed and challenged even if they are the default. - Often I am negative to give myself a way out and protect my ego from being damaged. - What I consider objective truth is a lot of the time just opinion. - When I am trying to persuade others of something often it is an expression of a desire for control. - When I find myself using the word "should" it is often the ego expressing its desires. - If I feel negative it's often the result of some underlying feeling or internal struggle that I haven't addressed. - I like being around people and most people (who are fun to be around) don't like hanging out with a negative person no matter how smart that person is. - Ignoring negative feelings doesn't make me a positive person. Acknowledging the negative thoughts/feelings but choosing to focus on positive feelings instead makes me a positive person. Doing this places negative thinking in its proper function I think. As a sort of alarm/warning system of potential negative outcomes that may occur or have occured. Ultimately if you find yourself being overly negative then just ask yourself why. What is the motivation? Is it context specific? If I just stayed quiet what would happen? Also whenever you find yourself saying a statement like "that wouldn't work" or "I can't do that" challenge it with questions. Doing this will surely result in surprises.