3 ms·

Would you say your discussion style in this thread is "meeting halfway", and typical of your discussion style at work? What would you say characterizes a "toxi

Would you say your discussion style in this thread is "meeting halfway", and typical of your discussion style at work? What would you say characterizes a "toxic" discussion style, or "being so bad at talking to people"?

Jensson 5y ago
No, I am much more aggressive online since I want to point holes in things. I doubt many people talk the same way online as they do at their job. It isn't like you expect a sales person to be all happy when he is at home. > What would you say characterizes a "toxic" discussion style, or "being so bad at talking to people"? People who can't talk normally due to some of the following reasons, if these are issues you have to deal with at your job instead of they dealing with it themselves then you work with people who lack social skills: > People are people and many don't understand or are actively afraid of technology. They have jobs to do and if they don't know you, they may be skeptical about what you can do for them. They might even have been burned in past by developers who promise but don't deliver.
- wvenable 5y ago
  You have a strange idea of what talking normally is. Fears, concerns, having different priorities, working under their own deadlines, and so on are all normal for other people.
  - Jensson 5y ago
    But a manager dumping those feelings on their developers is still toxic. They are coming from a position of power, asks the technologist to solve a problem, all the while demanding the technologist assures the manager that the technologist will do the job and that now the technologist will ask questions so the technologist can perform the job well instead of just wasting the managers precious time. I don't see how anyone can think this situation isn't toxic.
    - wvenable 5y ago
      I don't think the in-article example is a good one. However, the sentiment that developers need to have good soft skills if they work with end users is an important one. It doesn't matter how good you are building software if you build the wrong software.

Jensson 5y ago

No, I am much more aggressive online since I want to point holes in things. I doubt many people talk the same way online as they do at their job. It isn't like you expect a sales person to be all happy when he is at home. > What would you say characterizes a "toxic" discussion style, or "being so bad at talking to people"? People who can't talk normally due to some of the following reasons, if these are issues you have to deal with at your job instead of they dealing with it themselves then you work with people who lack social skills: > People are people and many don't understand or are actively afraid of technology. They have jobs to do and if they don't know you, they may be skeptical about what you can do for them. They might even have been burned in past by developers who promise but don't deliver.

wvenable 5y ago
You have a strange idea of what talking normally is. Fears, concerns, having different priorities, working under their own deadlines, and so on are all normal for other people.
- Jensson 5y ago
  But a manager dumping those feelings on their developers is still toxic. They are coming from a position of power, asks the technologist to solve a problem, all the while demanding the technologist assures the manager that the technologist will do the job and that now the technologist will ask questions so the technologist can perform the job well instead of just wasting the managers precious time. I don't see how anyone can think this situation isn't toxic.
  - wvenable 5y ago
    I don't think the in-article example is a good one. However, the sentiment that developers need to have good soft skills if they work with end users is an important one. It doesn't matter how good you are building software if you build the wrong software.