4 ms·

You're ignoring the fact that in most cultures saying you have a kid related event will get you out of something while usually retaining your standing in a comp

You're ignoring the fact that in most cultures saying you have a kid related event will get you out of something while usually retaining your standing in a company. Trying to negotiate leaving at 4pm so you can go home and relax is not seen in the same way. As a parent you're bargaining with more leverage.

dleslie 5y ago
Employee A: I have an event that I must attend and cannot inconsequentially avoid. Employee B: I want to go home and relax.
- another_story 5y ago
  As you posted down below, this should all be seen equally if the person is getting their work done, but it's not, and that's the point I was making.
- coderjames 5y ago
  Employee B: [to prevent burnout so that I can remain a functioning member of society.]
- sokoloff 5y ago
  Employee C: I'm leaving, see you tomorrow! As your co-worker or your boss, why do I care in the slightest whether you're going home to take care of your kid, to smoke a bowl and watch a movie, or because a new video game was released that day? If A, B, and C are all getting their work done in the time that they are working, I think equally of the three of them, as subordinate, peer, or supervisor.
  - dleslie 5y ago
    Bingo. A, B, and C should all just leave at a regular, reasonable time. And sometimes each of them has reason to leave early, and doesn't need to justify it.
mjmahone17 5y ago
This is an issue with your workplace. Yes, a parent is essentially threatening to be fired every time there is an issue with their kid. What we need is more people implicitly threatening the same whenever they have non-kid issues crop up that the business refuses to accommodate. It’s not that parents have more leverage, it’s that everyone knows a parent’s threats are real.
- klyrs 5y ago
  > What we need is more people implicitly threatening the same whenever they have non-kid issues crop up that the business refuses to accommodate. Much more fun to beat up on parents than cancer patients, isn't it?
klyrs 5y ago
Sure. But when my daycare falls through and I need to pick my kid up outside my normal schedule, I don't go home and "relax," I go home with parental duties which is work. So, no duh, going hone to "relax" is not the same. Now, if you need to run home because your basement is flooding, that will also be seen as different from going home to relax. When my kid is sick, I take a sick day. When school and daycare are both cancelled, I take a vacation day. Everybody at my work gets the same amount of both, only I'm more prone to using up my sick time and using vacation days to cover illness. Single people generally get all their vacation as vacation, and their vacations are breaks from responsibilities. My "vacations" happen on a schedule determined by school, and it's a vacation for my kid, with no real reduction in my responsibilities. "Hidden costs" indeed.

dleslie 5y ago

Employee A: I have an event that I must attend and cannot inconsequentially avoid. Employee B: I want to go home and relax.

another_story 5y ago
As you posted down below, this should all be seen equally if the person is getting their work done, but it's not, and that's the point I was making.
coderjames 5y ago
Employee B: [to prevent burnout so that I can remain a functioning member of society.]
sokoloff 5y ago
Employee C: I'm leaving, see you tomorrow! As your co-worker or your boss, why do I care in the slightest whether you're going home to take care of your kid, to smoke a bowl and watch a movie, or because a new video game was released that day? If A, B, and C are all getting their work done in the time that they are working, I think equally of the three of them, as subordinate, peer, or supervisor.
- dleslie 5y ago
  Bingo. A, B, and C should all just leave at a regular, reasonable time. And sometimes each of them has reason to leave early, and doesn't need to justify it.

mjmahone17 5y ago

This is an issue with your workplace. Yes, a parent is essentially threatening to be fired every time there is an issue with their kid. What we need is more people implicitly threatening the same whenever they have non-kid issues crop up that the business refuses to accommodate. It’s not that parents have more leverage, it’s that everyone knows a parent’s threats are real.

klyrs 5y ago
> What we need is more people implicitly threatening the same whenever they have non-kid issues crop up that the business refuses to accommodate. Much more fun to beat up on parents than cancer patients, isn't it?

klyrs 5y ago

Sure. But when my daycare falls through and I need to pick my kid up outside my normal schedule, I don't go home and "relax," I go home with parental duties which is work. So, no duh, going hone to "relax" is not the same. Now, if you need to run home because your basement is flooding, that will also be seen as different from going home to relax. When my kid is sick, I take a sick day. When school and daycare are both cancelled, I take a vacation day. Everybody at my work gets the same amount of both, only I'm more prone to using up my sick time and using vacation days to cover illness. Single people generally get all their vacation as vacation, and their vacations are breaks from responsibilities. My "vacations" happen on a schedule determined by school, and it's a vacation for my kid, with no real reduction in my responsibilities. "Hidden costs" indeed.