4 ms·

For those of you who miss the office, what does your life look like outside it? Do you have an active social circle? Do you have regular, sustained, positive in

by tmm 5y ago

For those of you who miss the office, what does your life look like outside it? Do you have an active social circle? Do you have regular, sustained, positive interaction with your neighbors (i.e. do you do more than say hello in passing)? Kids who do sports? A long commute or a short one? A house or an apartment? Do you do your own housework or do you hire it out? When you're in the office, where do you work (e.g. private office, cubicle, open plan)? Prior to working from home (since late 2018), my social circle was limited to the office. After nine years in the same neighborhood, I knew two neighbors (three before the ones next door moved away) and only one who I knew well enough to ask to pet-sit. Work and commuting consumed all of my time. I had a boat I visited once a month (mostly to make sure it still floated), hobbies that sat unnoticed for weeks or months at a time, and a house and garden that were decaying around me; all because I never had time for them. I paid a housekeeper to clean and a lawn service to cut the grass. I never liked the commute, but I did enjoy the office. Lunch with coworkers, happy hour at the bar next to the office, hanging out in the cafeteria or someone's office were all enjoyable activities. I would never trade a single benefit of working from home to get them back. Double my salary and a short commute (or a chauffeur) might tempt me back for a while (if only because I could then pay people to do a lot of the projects I'd otherwise put off), but it wouldn't keep me. Work from home has allowed me to: - not be distracted if I don't want to be. No one is on a speakerphone; there aren't conversations in the hallway; if the espresso machine makes noise, it's because I'm using it. Even having a private office with a solid, lockable door didn't insulate me from office noise the way working from home does (yes, there are more dogs barking, children playing, and lawns being mowed ... but unless I'm in a meeting those noises aren't distracting the way people talking is) - meet many of my neighbors (helps that they're mostly all working from home too) - spend more time at the marina. Used to be, I could only do that on weekends - work on my house. Used to be, I was too tired when I got home, so again limited to weekends - take a break from work during the day and still be productive on something else (housework, hobbies, etc). Before, taking a break from work meant a visit to the cafeteria or a chat with a coworker. Weeding a garden, washing my car, folding clothes, organizing my tools; all of these are fantastic activities for thinking up solutions to work problems - go racing every Wednesday night. Before, if I wanted to be at the dock at 5:00, I'd have to leave the office by 3:00. That really wasn't possible. Now I leave my house at 4:45 to be there on time. This, by far has been the biggest impact ... new friends at 36, who knew! - reclaim two hours of my life from commuting ... sure I could have moved closer to the office, but I tried that once and my next job just took me that much farther from home - reclaim my evenings because I'm not exhausted from commuting - work on my schedule. Aside from meetings, I can mostly work when I know I'll be most productive ... either early in the morning or late in the evening. And noone cares if I take a nap at 2:00 every day

felipellrocha 5y ago
I had all of that prior to covid, and and i still miss the office. It was another environment in which I could meet interesting people and bring them into my life. You might want to consider whether being at home was the thing that made you wander, or if just being in an unfamiliar state of being forced you to wander. I would reckon it's the latter because I can attribute my varied life to the fact that I'm an immigrant, and the immigration forcing me to think outside of the box to do all those things.
teirce 5y ago
You haven't gotten any responses here, so I'll bite. > Do you have an active social circle? Do you have regular, sustained, positive interaction with your neighbors (i.e. do you do more than say hello in passing)? Kids who do sports? A long commute or a short one? A house or an apartment? Do you do your own housework or do you hire it out? When you're in the office, where do you work (e.g. private office, cubicle, open plan)? I live in the US (bay area), so my responses will be based on that. A lot of us were forced to work remote for the last year and a half, which is a bit different than (I presume what you did was) deciding to work from home permanently. There are also pandemic-induced factors that might help people to miss the office more than they might in normal WFH circumstances. > Social circle / neighbors COVID kind of killed in-person socialization for a year for the cautious, so social circles and activities aren't as relevant here nor as easy to maintain (compared to a 'normal' WFH timeline). I had a couple groups that did online video calls and catchups / games, but all of those engagements slowly tapered off. It's also a time where it is incredibly difficult to meet new people, as most are either content with their current circle or are not open to engaging with new people due to COVID. This also applies to my neighbors in my apartment building - nobody seems to want to socialize (I've tried a bit). > Distractions I think I'm unique in this one in that I have difficulty maintaining focus for a few reasons, but the office isn't one of them. Once I have some headphones on I'm usually fine. > Marina and [insert other hobby] A lot of my hobbies I have were/are typically done at home. I like to read, play games, and sometimes watch tv or twitch or what not, with whatever else is my flavor hobby at the time. None of these are good at getting me out of my apartment, though it is nice to take a book somewhere and sit for a bit now that places are open more around me. > Commute / evenings / scheduling My commute is hellish. It's the one thing I don't miss about the office. I agree with you here. The only good thing was it being a good time for winding down after work, which still have to do anyway before I have the energy for another activity. --- I find a lot of the people who are satisfied with WFH fall into one or more of the following categories: people who live with others (partners, family), those who have kids[0], some own homes / larger living spaces. Partners and family keep you company. Kids can keep you busy. A larger space is easier to be in for a long amount of time. I'm someone who lives alone, in around 600-700sqft apartment, in a city where I only know a handful of people (who were in/out of town much of last year), was told to stay inside / social distance until early 2021, with nearly everything around me closed for a long time. I've spent a year and a half sometimes going weeks without seeing someone I know, and it has been very isolating and quite hellish. And I would even consider myself an introvert. My friends in the area happen to all be couples that are quite happy to spend time together. Things have been getting better the last six months or so, but 2020 was bad. (This point is a bit thin since in a 'normal' non-pandemic world, a lot of this wouldn't be the case. But 'free' socialization is one reason why I miss the office now.) Seeing other people you work with face-to-face is nice. It lets you take breaks / walks together, grab coffee, lunch, or generally just BS for 5-10 minutes when you both need a bit. That's aside from the working bits where proximity can help. I miss pairing with other developers on my team. Office perks were nice. My company provided meals, snacks, drinks, etc. There was also a well-equipped gym that was free, better than I can get in my area, and certainly better than what fits in my apartment. And the space is obviously much larger than my apartment. Working on a schedule helped provide some structure to day-to-day (for me). I miss going into the office because it provided some structure for me that I didn't have to do myself. I don't have the space to distance work from leisure in my apartment, which can make it difficult to focus. My home is full of many things that are more interesting than what I am working on, so the psychology is against me. Going into the office provided an easy separation here. So those are the reasons why I miss the office. That was longer than I thought it would be. Sorry for the wall of text there. --- I will admit that some of these are things I could address myself with moderate - large effort. I could be more proactive with friends and neighbors. I could be more disciplined with my schedule. I could try to find better outdoor hobbies. But honestly right now I am just trying to make it by however I can, so some of those seem daunting. I think that's a lot of folks right now. In hindsight, I should have packed all of my stuff in a storage unit and went to go bunk with some family for a year and work from there. In extra-extra hindsight, if you had told me in 2019 that this would happen, I would have kept living with my roommate instead of striking it out on my own in the fall. [0] I feel for the parents who relied on daycare / school as a 'break' from their kids and now have had to manage it themselves. I've also had that sympathy worn quite thin from all of the 'WFH must be great if you're single with no kids!' comments I've been seeing for a year. Frankly I'd kill for a spouse and some kids to provide any interaction or structure to a normal day.

by tmm 5y ago

felipellrocha 5y ago

I had all of that prior to covid, and and i still miss the office. It was another environment in which I could meet interesting people and bring them into my life. You might want to consider whether being at home was the thing that made you wander, or if just being in an unfamiliar state of being forced you to wander. I would reckon it's the latter because I can attribute my varied life to the fact that I'm an immigrant, and the immigration forcing me to think outside of the box to do all those things.

teirce 5y ago

You haven't gotten any responses here, so I'll bite. > Do you have an active social circle? Do you have regular, sustained, positive interaction with your neighbors (i.e. do you do more than say hello in passing)? Kids who do sports? A long commute or a short one? A house or an apartment? Do you do your own housework or do you hire it out? When you're in the office, where do you work (e.g. private office, cubicle, open plan)? I live in the US (bay area), so my responses will be based on that. A lot of us were forced to work remote for the last year and a half, which is a bit different than (I presume what you did was) deciding to work from home permanently. There are also pandemic-induced factors that might help people to miss the office more than they might in normal WFH circumstances. > Social circle / neighbors COVID kind of killed in-person socialization for a year for the cautious, so social circles and activities aren't as relevant here nor as easy to maintain (compared to a 'normal' WFH timeline). I had a couple groups that did online video calls and catchups / games, but all of those engagements slowly tapered off. It's also a time where it is incredibly difficult to meet new people, as most are either content with their current circle or are not open to engaging with new people due to COVID. This also applies to my neighbors in my apartment building - nobody seems to want to socialize (I've tried a bit). > Distractions I think I'm unique in this one in that I have difficulty maintaining focus for a few reasons, but the office isn't one of them. Once I have some headphones on I'm usually fine. > Marina and [insert other hobby] A lot of my hobbies I have were/are typically done at home. I like to read, play games, and sometimes watch tv or twitch or what not, with whatever else is my flavor hobby at the time. None of these are good at getting me out of my apartment, though it is nice to take a book somewhere and sit for a bit now that places are open more around me. > Commute / evenings / scheduling My commute is hellish. It's the one thing I don't miss about the office. I agree with you here. The only good thing was it being a good time for winding down after work, which still have to do anyway before I have the energy for another activity. --- I find a lot of the people who are satisfied with WFH fall into one or more of the following categories: people who live with others (partners, family), those who have kids[0], some own homes / larger living spaces. Partners and family keep you company. Kids can keep you busy. A larger space is easier to be in for a long amount of time. I'm someone who lives alone, in around 600-700sqft apartment, in a city where I only know a handful of people (who were in/out of town much of last year), was told to stay inside / social distance until early 2021, with nearly everything around me closed for a long time. I've spent a year and a half sometimes going weeks without seeing someone I know, and it has been very isolating and quite hellish. And I would even consider myself an introvert. My friends in the area happen to all be couples that are quite happy to spend time together. Things have been getting better the last six months or so, but 2020 was bad. (This point is a bit thin since in a 'normal' non-pandemic world, a lot of this wouldn't be the case. But 'free' socialization is one reason why I miss the office now.) Seeing other people you work with face-to-face is nice. It lets you take breaks / walks together, grab coffee, lunch, or generally just BS for 5-10 minutes when you both need a bit. That's aside from the working bits where proximity can help. I miss pairing with other developers on my team. Office perks were nice. My company provided meals, snacks, drinks, etc. There was also a well-equipped gym that was free, better than I can get in my area, and certainly better than what fits in my apartment. And the space is obviously much larger than my apartment. Working on a schedule helped provide some structure to day-to-day (for me). I miss going into the office because it provided some structure for me that I didn't have to do myself. I don't have the space to distance work from leisure in my apartment, which can make it difficult to focus. My home is full of many things that are more interesting than what I am working on, so the psychology is against me. Going into the office provided an easy separation here. So those are the reasons why I miss the office. That was longer than I thought it would be. Sorry for the wall of text there. --- I will admit that some of these are things I could address myself with moderate - large effort. I could be more proactive with friends and neighbors. I could be more disciplined with my schedule. I could try to find better outdoor hobbies. But honestly right now I am just trying to make it by however I can, so some of those seem daunting. I think that's a lot of folks right now. In hindsight, I should have packed all of my stuff in a storage unit and went to go bunk with some family for a year and work from there. In extra-extra hindsight, if you had told me in 2019 that this would happen, I would have kept living with my roommate instead of striking it out on my own in the fall. [0] I feel for the parents who relied on daycare / school as a 'break' from their kids and now have had to manage it themselves. I've also had that sympathy worn quite thin from all of the 'WFH must be great if you're single with no kids!' comments I've been seeing for a year. Frankly I'd kill for a spouse and some kids to provide any interaction or structure to a normal day.