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For me there are three big reasons: * The pure stress of having a child, which I don't think I could handle, and the associated limitation on my own life due t
by joeberon 5y ago
For me there are three big reasons:
* The pure stress of having a child, which I don't think I could handle, and the associated limitation on my own life due to that
* Loss of any sense of social pressure and lack of any ideal that it is something I should do
* I also can't escape the idea that for me it would be a fundamentally selfish act, I would only be doing it because I'm scared of regretting not doing it, which for me is reason enough to _not_ do it
- rabuse 5y agoI'm the same in those views. It's not for me.
- prawn 5y agoPrior to having children, I never thought ahead about being a parent. Didn't consider myself "good with kids", wasn't drawn to the idea. My wife was keen and I was keen (then and now) on her. It's never felt like a selfish act and always the absolute opposite. You make lifestyle sacrifices, and you become selfless - you will do anything for them. It's hard work, but it's exceptionally rewarding and gives me purpose. Telling your wide-eyed children about their world is just magic. I can't imagine anything else now and never regret it. I can appreciate how it might look from one side of the timeline, but step over the date of their birth and for any half decent parent, it's selfless IMO. Edit: I see from another comment that you have made a firm decision, so didn't want this to come across as criticism of your choice in any way; mostly wanted to address that "selfish/selfless" thing, and for anyone on the fence.