4 ms·

Not married, but if I were and kids were a topic of discussion my, ranked, reasons: * Money - It's hard enough to retire with a late start on planning, kids to

by selykg 5y ago

Not married, but if I were and kids were a topic of discussion my, ranked, reasons: * Money - It's hard enough to retire with a late start on planning, kids totally throw another monkey wrench in it * Time - I don't have the time, or the patience, for kids. I'm sure it's rewarding for those that do it, but every time I look at my friends with kids and the sacrifices they make for their own lives, during their prime years of living, for the sake of their kids... yea, it's like birth control on steroids for me. I was going to put freedom as a separate line item, but I think time and money both take the point for freedom. * An extension of money, I would have to move at some point, and it seems to me doing it earlier would be better. My house is small, and it'd be fine for two people, maybe three. But it'll start to feel cramped with three. This isn't as big a deal, hence it's lower on the list, but with house prices and availability the way they are right now... plus, the time necessary to move. * Climate change, the world ending, whatever the case may be. I find it utterly difficult to willingly bring another child into this world when it feels like no one actually gives a damn about the future. That all said, I feel like I'd be more interested in adopting if I were to ever jump on this "got to have kids" thing. Skip the potty training and terrible (twos, threes and fours), jump right into the "I hate you" teens I guess. Yea, you can tell I'm not a kid person huh? lol Edit: because holy hell, even in 2021 Hacker News can't do Markdown for shit.

deleted 5y ago
[deleted]
circlefavshape 5y ago
So you're in a local maximum, and are afraid to leave it? That's fine, but ... well, forgive me if I'm misinterpreting you, but your words give the impression that you're striving for mastery over life. One of the big gifts that parenthood gives you is freedom from the illusion that life is something that can be mastered
- selykg 5y ago
  lol, so far away from a local maximum. I am striving towards trying to make my life my own. I feel like I've failed at that pretty badly so far as well. It's very much a roll with the punches type of thing over here. Seems to me nothing goes right or according to plan. I will happily admit that life cannot be mastered.
Zak 5y ago
HN intentionally does not do Markdown at all. https://news.ycombinator.com/formatdoc https://news.ycombinator.com/formatdoc
torstenvl 5y ago
> Climate change, the world ending, whatever the case may be. I find it utterly difficult to willingly bring another child into this world when it feels like no one actually gives a damn about the future. I respect your right to make this decision for yourself, of course, but don't you think this is a little ironic? Climate change itself is less of a threat to the future than the self-selection toward extinction of the culture of people who care about fixing climate change.
- selykg 5y ago
  I think it's a larger thing in general. I tried to keep it non-political. But I probably could've hit two birds with one stone by saying "environment." Both our political environment and our physical environment. This is perhaps a bit more US centric as well. But with this country as divided as it is, with an emphasis on climate change because that's the original topic of discussion, I don't think I really want to bring children into this world where people just generally can't get along, and have no real desire to care about their future as well. > self-selection toward extinction of the culture of people who care about fixing climate change. Maybe it's a defeatist attitude, but I feel like the people that care about climate change have lost this war already.

by selykg 5y ago

deleted 5y ago

[deleted]

circlefavshape 5y ago

So you're in a local maximum, and are afraid to leave it? That's fine, but ... well, forgive me if I'm misinterpreting you, but your words give the impression that you're striving for mastery over life. One of the big gifts that parenthood gives you is freedom from the illusion that life is something that can be mastered

selykg 5y ago
lol, so far away from a local maximum. I am striving towards trying to make my life my own. I feel like I've failed at that pretty badly so far as well. It's very much a roll with the punches type of thing over here. Seems to me nothing goes right or according to plan. I will happily admit that life cannot be mastered.

Zak 5y ago

HN intentionally does not do Markdown at all. https://news.ycombinator.com/formatdoc https://news.ycombinator.com/formatdoc

torstenvl 5y ago

> Climate change, the world ending, whatever the case may be. I find it utterly difficult to willingly bring another child into this world when it feels like no one actually gives a damn about the future. I respect your right to make this decision for yourself, of course, but don't you think this is a little ironic? Climate change itself is less of a threat to the future than the self-selection toward extinction of the culture of people who care about fixing climate change.

selykg 5y ago
I think it's a larger thing in general. I tried to keep it non-political. But I probably could've hit two birds with one stone by saying "environment." Both our political environment and our physical environment. This is perhaps a bit more US centric as well. But with this country as divided as it is, with an emphasis on climate change because that's the original topic of discussion, I don't think I really want to bring children into this world where people just generally can't get along, and have no real desire to care about their future as well. > self-selection toward extinction of the culture of people who care about fixing climate change. Maybe it's a defeatist attitude, but I feel like the people that care about climate change have lost this war already.