Treat everyone equal, period. If she is hurting her team her manager needs to be aware and address it. If your manager is asking you to help her, give her some

Treat everyone equal, period. If she is hurting her team her manager needs to be aware and address it. If your manager is asking you to help her, give her some extra grace and offer your help without judgement (you should really do that for anyone). Also make sure your manager gives you guidance on how to proceed too. One thing to consider. I absolutely treat everyone equal, but that doesn't mean I approach everyone the same, or work with them the same. Even two guys of the same age might have very different styles, one being more sensitive and another used to direct feedback. For women in tech, life isn't always easy, and many times they will feel that they need to put up a defensive front and hide weakness (some men do too). Give her the grace to assume she isn't incompetent and just needs some non-judgemental mentoring. I've found that if you talk to people genuinely, not being condescending, and just show that you recognize it can be hard they will start to drop the barrier (at least with you) because they'll realize you aren't that person and you are open to helping them. All that said, her manager needs to know how the team feels, and in the end her gender should never be a factor in the hiring or firing decision. With some mentoring and help she either succeeds or leaves. Usually IME, if you give people mentoring and it is just past their ability they will leave on their own, even more so when they have seen the company put effort towards helping them and they just don't get it. Guilt and embarrassment kicks in for most people and they'll leave on their own at that point.