[adjusts evil business marketing hat] Soft-pitch. We buy cycles on some advanced text-to-speech service, do some ML training or whatever, and make a device tha

[adjusts evil business marketing hat] Soft-pitch. We buy cycles on some advanced text-to-speech service, do some ML training or whatever, and make a device that can watch your plant and then conversationally answer questions about its health esp hydration Yes yes I know there are soil probes or whatever for $25 but I need you to have _vision_ here. Vernor Vinge's _A Fire upon the Deep_ was trending on HN this very day. It features murderous talking AI-enhanced plants. Coincidence? Ha! The market is ready. It behooves -- BEHOOVES -- us to answer the timeless question: What if your plant was like able to talk to you, answer questions, and buy things for you that you mention in passing conversation? Sentiment for our green children is often high, and this makes any prospective marketing and/or suggestion much stickier. It's not an enormous corporation asking you to buy something. It's your lil buddy that you overwatered yesterday. Do it a solid. You owe it. EXPECTED RESULT: [reproachfully] "Excuse me, John. You've been careless with me for weeks. Might I suggest you purchase an elegant set of stainless steel professional pruning shears, available from seller ADSF for only $123.95? It would go a long way to repairing our relationship."