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I agree with everything you wrote except your last sentence: > "Negotiating also means giving up things you don't value for things that you do..." That descri
by chrisweekly 5y ago
I agree with everything you wrote except your last sentence:
> "Negotiating also means giving up things you don't value for things that you do..."
That describes "compromise", not "negotiation".
In my experience (23 years in software, 5y consulting), in some ways negotiation is more like poker: coming out on top doesn't always mean you had the best hand, just that you played it right. On the other hand, it's not necessarily such a starkly zero-sum game. Of course it is in the sense of absolute #s, ie the less they pay me the more they get to keep -- but by insisting on being well-compensated for your skills and experience, you rule out the wrong workplaces and send the right message. If "I'm expensive, and worth it" isn't how you -- and your employer or clients -- see yourself, you're doing it wrong.
- felipellrocha 5y agoTo be fair, i don’t think OP described a situation where one side is winning, so there is no compromise. In the case of compromise, i envision having to give up something i want for something I want more. Giving up something i don’t want for something I want feels like just regular negotiating, and feels like a space in which everyone can win.
- chrisweekly 5y agoGood point.
- WalterBright 5y agoConsider you're having a garage sale. You're giving up things you do not value for things you do value (cash). When negotiation for a job, an offer usually includes various benefits in addition to the salary. Such as paid time off, relocation expenses, stock options, etc. Some you may want more than others. So you trade away for the benefits you have little use for in exchange for more salary or other benefits you value more. A good negotiator can produce a win-win both sides benefit solution by mutual determination of what each side values and does not value - it is not zero sum, just like your garage sale is not zero sum.
- chrisweekly 5y agoYou're right. The point I had intended to make was more like setting a price on the garage sale items and simply saying "no" to lowball offers; getting market value doesn't have to require giving up anything.
- tyingq 5y agoEnding up with a significantly higher salary than your peers isn't always the best outcome either. It sets expectations that you may not be able to meet.
- chrisweekly 5y agoWell sure, you have to back it up. (1) Be great at your job. (2) Make sure you're getting paid well for it. Nobody else is going to make sure you're paid what you're worth. Which is much more than median salaries if you have skills.
- aiisjustanif 5y agoWho said there are different expectations?
- friedman23 5y agoIn practice, titles determine expectations not pay.