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Japan’s deep connection to childish relationships (2019)

39 points by qwertyuiop_ 5y ago

paulsutter 5y ago
The longer I lived in Japan, the more I realized that generalizations about Japan are naive/mistaken. And yes I know they come from enthusiasm and meant positively.
- dlivingston 5y ago
  Can you expand on this? With respect to this article, what did the author get wrong?
  - toto444 5y ago
    It's explained here https://old.reddit.com/r/japan/comments/eau0cx/japans_deep_connection_to_childish_relationships/ https://old.reddit.com/r/japan/comments/eau0cx/japans_deep_c...
  - paulsutter 5y ago
    If I tried to explain the REAL truth about Japan, it would be just as wrong
    - trevyn 5y ago
      Is there anything you could say that would move the needle in the right direction?
- theo-steiner 5y ago
  Thank you for saying this. I live in Japan too and I literally cringe whenever I see something Japan related on here. It's mostly generalizations infused with orientalism and nihonjinron.
alexlur 5y ago
Previous discussion: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=21793936 https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=21793936
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noisy_boy 5y ago
My dad used to take me to a old-fashioned shop which was not very conveniently located but offered good discount (we were not exactly well-off so that mattered). It was located at the end of a dead alley away from the main road, the owner would hardly speak beyond a few words and my dad, who loved to bargain and haggle everywhere, would simply pay the bill with zero fuss. It was sort of an odd ritual which stopped when I left my city to find work elsewhere. Now a days, we don't need to bother going there just for those discounts any more. However, every time I go back home, I tell my dad to go shopping for the same stuff and he invariably takes me to the same shop. I select what I want and when the bill comes, I never pay. Scratch that, I don't even offer/try to pay - he pays. To borrow from the article, that is my amae from him. Furthermore, it my amae that is guaranteed to be successful, no matter what comes in life. The contentment that assurance brings is irreplaceable.
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39 points by qwertyuiop_ 5y ago

The longer I lived in Japan, the more I realized that generalizations about Japan are naive/mistaken. And yes I know they come from enthusiasm and meant positively.

dlivingston 5y ago
Can you expand on this? With respect to this article, what did the author get wrong?
- toto444 5y ago
  It's explained here https://old.reddit.com/r/japan/comments/eau0cx/japans_deep_connection_to_childish_relationships/ https://old.reddit.com/r/japan/comments/eau0cx/japans_deep_c...
- paulsutter 5y ago
  If I tried to explain the REAL truth about Japan, it would be just as wrong
  - trevyn 5y ago
    Is there anything you could say that would move the needle in the right direction?
theo-steiner 5y ago
Thank you for saying this. I live in Japan too and I literally cringe whenever I see something Japan related on here. It's mostly generalizations infused with orientalism and nihonjinron.

alexlur 5y ago

Previous discussion: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=21793936 https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=21793936

deleted 5y ago

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noisy_boy 5y ago

My dad used to take me to a old-fashioned shop which was not very conveniently located but offered good discount (we were not exactly well-off so that mattered). It was located at the end of a dead alley away from the main road, the owner would hardly speak beyond a few words and my dad, who loved to bargain and haggle everywhere, would simply pay the bill with zero fuss. It was sort of an odd ritual which stopped when I left my city to find work elsewhere. Now a days, we don't need to bother going there just for those discounts any more. However, every time I go back home, I tell my dad to go shopping for the same stuff and he invariably takes me to the same shop. I select what I want and when the bill comes, I never pay. Scratch that, I don't even offer/try to pay - he pays. To borrow from the article, that is my amae from him. Furthermore, it my amae that is guaranteed to be successful, no matter what comes in life. The contentment that assurance brings is irreplaceable.

deleted 5y ago

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