4 ms·

> After the habit of scrolling and liking wears off, you suddenly find yourself in a joyful place. A quieter, calmer, less demanding place where you don’t want

> After the habit of scrolling and liking wears off, you suddenly find yourself in a joyful place. A quieter, calmer, less demanding place where you don’t want to know what others are doing. You focus on what you want to do. But what if you don't know what you want to do? I feel like this post was written from the perspective of someone who already has their own life goals sorted out, and social media was clearly acting as an obstacle to accomplishing those well-defined goals, so they dropped social media. But when you're on your own, it is not a given that you have everything figured out and all you need to do is give yourself a lot of free time and just do what you want. The void that remains is exactly the kind that social media is designed to fill for many people. That kind of feeling almost legitimizes the concept of FOMO, because at a certain point you cannot imagine how anything you're doing could be more interesting than the things that other people are moving forward with in their lives. You want to aspire to be something, and looking for someone else to copy would mean you at least have some kind of aspiration to work towards, instead of nothing at all. Social media is a net negative overall, but once it's out of the picture you have to work on yourself, and in that domain there are no easy answers.

ipaddr 5y ago
That void is important because it allows you to find what you really want. Social media is better than drinking.
- eloff 5y ago
  It's not a void though. It's a distraction. And as much as I dislike the evils that come with alcohol (not in a religious sense, just the problems it causes), at least you get out and interact with real people.
verisimi 5y ago
"you have to work on yourself, and in that domain there are no easy answers." I couldn't agree more. But, if you step back, its a pretty easy resolution.. Do you want to be endlessly troughing at stupid cat pictures, or do you want to make the attempt to understand what you want, why you are here, and what you need to do? Most people won't take the first step, ever.
MonaroVXR 5y ago
>You want to aspire to be something, and looking for someone else to copy would mean you at least have some kind of aspiration to work towards, instead of nothing at all. And this were I watch athletes, cars and gave fun with the IT group and programming meme page. When I'm opening Facebook I'm laughing at posts. It's genuine. I can't do this in the place where I live. It's almost if things are flipped around. Facebook positive, real world negative. Very weird.
- Zababa 5y ago
  Social media is what you make of it. I use twitter to interact with a few close friends and see nice stuff that I couldn't share with my family or at work. It's great! But like a garden, you have to protect it, and tend it. That means for me having a private account, following a small number of people, muting stuff I don't like, desactivating retweets I don't like, carefully picking who can follow me. I have no chance of making viral content with that account, and I don't meet many new people, but it's a tradeoff.
eloff 5y ago
You won't find yourself by seeking distraction. You need to eliminate distractions and feel the pain of boredom, which will motivate you to try things.
- stanislavb 5y ago
  This.
  - moffkalast 5y ago
    There was this Veratasium video recently about this very thing, apparently boredom is indeed crucial for creativity.
    - eloff 5y ago
      There's also talks by Cal Newport and Michael Easter on this subject, you can find them on YouTube.
- eloff 5y ago
  It's late for me to edit this, but I want to add that I think this is why so many young people seem to be struggling to find themselves. We live in a world of constant distraction and you will only find yourself in the quiet. I didn't struggle with this, but I had that quiet being homeschooled in the woods with no TV and Internet too shitty for gaming. That's when I discovered I loved computer programming, and I never looked back. I don't want to imply that finding yourself is just about work, but it's probably the biggest part given how much time we spend doing it. My wife on the other hand is constantly inundated with distraction and she is still struggling to find herself. I strongly feel that's part of the problem.
- eyelidlessness 5y ago
  I found my self by seeking distraction, but go off.
- PikachuEXE 5y ago
  People need the empty time/space/gap (whatever you call it) to do more thinking. Some people intentionally created more time/space/gap to do more thinking. Distraction like social media filled that gap too easily compared to thinking. We need more people preferring more thinking or even "overthinking". https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=28158435 https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=28158435
unethical_ban 5y ago
Then you focus on finding what you want to do. Honestly, pretty much any idle activity is more productive for the human mind than doomscrolling social media feeds. Sitting in the void. Going for a walk. Watching the grass blow in the wind. Putting together a puzzle, doing a crossword. There is a unique unhealthiness to chronic overuse of social media, in my opinion, and the point is that it is addictive and takes work to break free - but once you do, you feel freer.
greggman3 5y ago
People did just fine without social media for 7000+ years. You don't suddenly need social media to fill some void that wasn't possible to fill before social media existed. Note: I'm not dissing social media. I like it when it works well. I'm just responding to this idea that it's a need.

ipaddr 5y ago

That void is important because it allows you to find what you really want. Social media is better than drinking.

eloff 5y ago
It's not a void though. It's a distraction. And as much as I dislike the evils that come with alcohol (not in a religious sense, just the problems it causes), at least you get out and interact with real people.

verisimi 5y ago

"you have to work on yourself, and in that domain there are no easy answers." I couldn't agree more. But, if you step back, its a pretty easy resolution.. Do you want to be endlessly troughing at stupid cat pictures, or do you want to make the attempt to understand what you want, why you are here, and what you need to do? Most people won't take the first step, ever.

MonaroVXR 5y ago

>You want to aspire to be something, and looking for someone else to copy would mean you at least have some kind of aspiration to work towards, instead of nothing at all. And this were I watch athletes, cars and gave fun with the IT group and programming meme page. When I'm opening Facebook I'm laughing at posts. It's genuine. I can't do this in the place where I live. It's almost if things are flipped around. Facebook positive, real world negative. Very weird.

Zababa 5y ago
Social media is what you make of it. I use twitter to interact with a few close friends and see nice stuff that I couldn't share with my family or at work. It's great! But like a garden, you have to protect it, and tend it. That means for me having a private account, following a small number of people, muting stuff I don't like, desactivating retweets I don't like, carefully picking who can follow me. I have no chance of making viral content with that account, and I don't meet many new people, but it's a tradeoff.

eloff 5y ago

You won't find yourself by seeking distraction. You need to eliminate distractions and feel the pain of boredom, which will motivate you to try things.

stanislavb 5y ago
This.
- moffkalast 5y ago
  There was this Veratasium video recently about this very thing, apparently boredom is indeed crucial for creativity.
  - eloff 5y ago
    There's also talks by Cal Newport and Michael Easter on this subject, you can find them on YouTube.
eloff 5y ago
It's late for me to edit this, but I want to add that I think this is why so many young people seem to be struggling to find themselves. We live in a world of constant distraction and you will only find yourself in the quiet. I didn't struggle with this, but I had that quiet being homeschooled in the woods with no TV and Internet too shitty for gaming. That's when I discovered I loved computer programming, and I never looked back. I don't want to imply that finding yourself is just about work, but it's probably the biggest part given how much time we spend doing it. My wife on the other hand is constantly inundated with distraction and she is still struggling to find herself. I strongly feel that's part of the problem.
eyelidlessness 5y ago
I found my self by seeking distraction, but go off.
PikachuEXE 5y ago
People need the empty time/space/gap (whatever you call it) to do more thinking. Some people intentionally created more time/space/gap to do more thinking. Distraction like social media filled that gap too easily compared to thinking. We need more people preferring more thinking or even "overthinking". https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=28158435 https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=28158435

unethical_ban 5y ago

Then you focus on finding what you want to do. Honestly, pretty much any idle activity is more productive for the human mind than doomscrolling social media feeds. Sitting in the void. Going for a walk. Watching the grass blow in the wind. Putting together a puzzle, doing a crossword. There is a unique unhealthiness to chronic overuse of social media, in my opinion, and the point is that it is addictive and takes work to break free - but once you do, you feel freer.

greggman3 5y ago

People did just fine without social media for 7000+ years. You don't suddenly need social media to fill some void that wasn't possible to fill before social media existed. Note: I'm not dissing social media. I like it when it works well. I'm just responding to this idea that it's a need.