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This guy is me. Interested in this chat. And how I can improve my model. Get more info about the project at noodler.substack.com

LurkingPenguin 5y ago
> And how I can improve my model. With no offense intended, I think the "dating affiliate" model you've come up with should be totally scrapped. First, having your friends send your "profile" to women they know as email "bait" is cringe. Imagine you're a woman who receives this email. What would you think? My guess is that a lot of women will find it creepy or desperate, even if you really are a nice guy and great catch. Even consider how your "experiment" is being portrayed in this news article: you're "tired" of online dating, not enjoying it and have been looking for years without luck. All negative. Second, you're asking women (who you call "candidates") to take time to submit a profile so that a committee of your friends can decide whether they're worthy of your attention. There's a fundamental disconnect here: the supply of dates you consider to be of sufficient quality is apparently low but you're treating the women as if the opposite is true. Not a good look. Third, you want to meet a woman and get married right? If a woman applies for the job, why not be respectful and make a decision about whether you want to go out on a date or not? Once again, I think any woman who encounters this "experiment" is going to see this as a huge negative. As a general rule, women are more attracted to men who are decisive and take responsibility for their lives. It doesn't mean you have to act like a NAVY Seal but I believe asking your friends to decide who you date is going to be unattractive to the vast majority of women. Fourth, I think you should consider the possibility that how you're presenting yourself will have a bigger impact on your results than the model you use to distribute your "profile". You describe yourself as a "fun guy serious about love" but again, put yourself in a woman's shoes. Does the very next sentence ("steady income, with a good credit rating") scream "fun!"? Do your requirements/preferences for a woman ("You’re kind and have a curious mind. Live within 10km of Vancouver. Or have good wifi") make it seem like you really know what you're looking for, or provide enough meaningful detail so that you might connect with someone you share a unique common interest, hobby, etc. with? The quality of your presentation makes all the difference and again with no offense intended, I don't think you've got your profile down. Great profiles gets interest, lackluster ones don't. In any channel. Having your friends deliver your profile to women through email won't change that. Finally, introductions from friends to potential dates can be a really good way to meet women. You shouldn't have to pay your friends to introduce you. If you've let your friends know that you're single and hoping to meet someone and they never introduce you to anyone, it's worth figuring out why.
throwawaysea 5y ago
Just to help out, since the URL above isn’t a complete clickable link, here’s a link to the details of the experiment and reward model: https://noodler.substack.com/p/the-ball-and-chain-letter https://noodler.substack.com/p/the-ball-and-chain-letter
- danrobhawkins 5y ago
  thanks!

LurkingPenguin 5y ago

> And how I can improve my model. With no offense intended, I think the "dating affiliate" model you've come up with should be totally scrapped. First, having your friends send your "profile" to women they know as email "bait" is cringe. Imagine you're a woman who receives this email. What would you think? My guess is that a lot of women will find it creepy or desperate, even if you really are a nice guy and great catch. Even consider how your "experiment" is being portrayed in this news article: you're "tired" of online dating, not enjoying it and have been looking for years without luck. All negative. Second, you're asking women (who you call "candidates") to take time to submit a profile so that a committee of your friends can decide whether they're worthy of your attention. There's a fundamental disconnect here: the supply of dates you consider to be of sufficient quality is apparently low but you're treating the women as if the opposite is true. Not a good look. Third, you want to meet a woman and get married right? If a woman applies for the job, why not be respectful and make a decision about whether you want to go out on a date or not? Once again, I think any woman who encounters this "experiment" is going to see this as a huge negative. As a general rule, women are more attracted to men who are decisive and take responsibility for their lives. It doesn't mean you have to act like a NAVY Seal but I believe asking your friends to decide who you date is going to be unattractive to the vast majority of women. Fourth, I think you should consider the possibility that how you're presenting yourself will have a bigger impact on your results than the model you use to distribute your "profile". You describe yourself as a "fun guy serious about love" but again, put yourself in a woman's shoes. Does the very next sentence ("steady income, with a good credit rating") scream "fun!"? Do your requirements/preferences for a woman ("You’re kind and have a curious mind. Live within 10km of Vancouver. Or have good wifi") make it seem like you really know what you're looking for, or provide enough meaningful detail so that you might connect with someone you share a unique common interest, hobby, etc. with? The quality of your presentation makes all the difference and again with no offense intended, I don't think you've got your profile down. Great profiles gets interest, lackluster ones don't. In any channel. Having your friends deliver your profile to women through email won't change that. Finally, introductions from friends to potential dates can be a really good way to meet women. You shouldn't have to pay your friends to introduce you. If you've let your friends know that you're single and hoping to meet someone and they never introduce you to anyone, it's worth figuring out why.

throwawaysea 5y ago

Just to help out, since the URL above isn’t a complete clickable link, here’s a link to the details of the experiment and reward model: https://noodler.substack.com/p/the-ball-and-chain-letter https://noodler.substack.com/p/the-ball-and-chain-letter

danrobhawkins 5y ago
thanks!