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It's not rocket science. It is, however, really hard. It's very hard to know whether to stay or go but i generally feel happy with marriage and kids. While it t
by dr_dshiv 5y ago
It's not rocket science. It is, however, really hard. It's very hard to know whether to stay or go but i generally feel happy with marriage and kids. While it takes a lot of time and soul, it removes the need to be looking for someone, which can leave a lot of time for working on what i want to be working on. That's optimistic, but, hey.
- blunte 5y agoMarriage and kids can be a very happy and enriching experience, for all involved. I'm not disputing that. (I had 15 years of magnificent marriage and have two amazing young adult children. I wouldn't trade that for anything.) But this assumption that two people who find each other a perfect match now will still feel that way in 5, 10, 20, 40 years is just unrealistic. It would be much better if people understood that we are all unique, and we all grow and expand in different ways. Sometimes a couple grows in the same way (and usually they do, quite a lot); but sometimes one of the couple grows in a different direction - discovers something important to them which pulls them away. It doesn't mean there was a problem with the other person or the relationship. A very simple example is when one person finds their career developing and fulfilling, but the other partner has a happy life in a certain town, near their family, friends, etc. To stay together, one of them probably must give up something very important. But to realize that a parting doesn't mean losing connection, it just means going separate ways, is natural.