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The Anatomy of Assholes (2020)
- solarmist 5y agoI love the term asshole circumplex.
- makach 5y agoIndeed. Comedy is usually frowned upon in here, but this article posted is golden. We're all some type of asshole. Definitively a dark eye opener for me.
- bryanrasmussen 5y ago>a dark eye opener for me. there are some things to be said for not having comedy though.
- makach 5y agoIndeed, and I have been downvoted thoroughly for it.
- Gravityloss 5y agoThat was actually not the point of the article. You can be an extrovert and an asshole at the same time. Or someone who is quiet and still an asshole.
- m4r35n357 5y agoInternal Server Error Assholes!
- jmauritz 5y agoI disagree on the usage of agency here and the entire post really. Being an introvert SWE (70% of HN?) a lot solo consultants would be placed between quiet asshole and nice, but not often extroverted. Are these people low in agency? Is the traditional "nerd" low on agency? hardly. agency per the article: "self-protection, self-assertion, separation, and isolation"
- hoseja 5y agoNobody but maybe the CIA and select warlords and old money heirs has any meaningful personal agency.
- eurasiantiger 5y agoIt is what it is. To paraphrase George Carlin: in any store, we can choose between dozens of different flavors of the same food item, but for some reason, we cannot affect any meaningful change through any of the choices given to us.
- fctorial 5y agoWhere is it from?
- eurasiantiger 5y agoI believe it is from ”Illusion of choice”: > The things that matter in this country have been reduced in choice, there are two political parties, there are a handful insurance companies, there are six or seven information centers.. but if you want a bagel there are 23 flavors. Because you have the illusion of choice!
- eurasiantiger 5y agoSeparation and isolation not in the sense that you are alone in your apartment, but in the sense that your thoughts and decisions are yours and not linked to or overridden by someone else’s. The software engineer is notoriously low on agency.
- thenoblesunfish 5y agohttps://webcache.googleusercontent.com/search?q=cache:bzi1yEnZyZAJ:https://scottbarrykaufman.com/the-anatomy-of-assholes/ https://webcache.googleusercontent.com/search?q=cache:bzi1yE...
- lostlogin 5y agoAnd there was me thinking that the error message was the joke and that I was just not getting it.
- inshadows 5y agoWritten by judgemental asshole. Since this article is about labeling other people as assholes, I hope it's OK that I did the same.
- coldtea 5y agoSure it's ok. The question is whether it's useful or just a knee-jerk reaction.
- jbotz 5y agoUnlike you, he didn't actually label anyone, since he didn't talk about any specific assholes, he just described the category. Big difference.
- posterboy 5y ago> he didn't actually label anyone a) she b) sure she did
- PennRobotics 5y agoWhile skimming his Twitter to form my own opinion (He doesn't seem terrible at all, at first glance.): If someone disapproves of your lifestyle it's most likely their own shadow talking.
- jamil7 5y agohttps://web.archive.org/web/20210823064617/https://scottbarrykaufman.com/the-anatomy-of-assholes/ https://web.archive.org/web/20210823064617/https://scottbarr... Edit: What was the downvote for?
- pgt 5y agoI, for one, was hoping for an anatomical analysis of the evolution of the universal sphincter. This article is about assholes in life/the workplace.
- eurasiantiger 5y agoYou have hundreds of sphincters, but this is a special one.
- pestatije 5y agoYes, "anatomy" is clearly not the right word there. It could have been worse though: "AAA - Assholes' Anatomy Analized"
- AussieWog93 5y ago>Edit: What was the downvote for? They were probably just an asshole.
- hedberg10 5y agoSee: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Assholes:_A_Theory https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Assholes:_A_Theory Today on the train I saw some bullies. Kids wouldn't let the quieter kid sit with them. What I could see immediately in their eyes is the knowledge that they can just do that. There are no repercussions. There is nothing anybody can do. This works. The bully just lashing out because of his own issues is a myth. This is just how humans work and certain societies are able to mitigate the blow. There is a social hierarchy, we reward those who enforce it and we respect those who create it - which is good (agency), even if they behave like assholes - which is bad. I don't know where I'm going with this, but there are people who take what isn't theirs. Even just in the physical realm policing doesn't seem to work that well. There are just societies with more trust and thus less thievery. What to do about our psychological world?
- kmlevitt 5y ago> What I could see immediately in their eyes is the knowledge that they can just do that. There are no repercussions. There is nothing anybody can do. This works. The bully just lashing out because of his own issues is a myth. These two things are not mutually exclusive though. If you want to take your frustrations out on somebody else, you do it on people you can take them out on, not people you can’t. And yeah, most of those little shits have issues. Just because someone is an asshole doesn’t mean they don’t have anxieties and insecurities that motivate their behavior.
- hedberg10 5y agoI think what I mean is not even taking out frustrations. This behavior doesn't need an a priori frustration. That is the big issue. I'm able to forgive a frustration. You cut me off, you have a bad day/parent in hospital - I'm able to live with that. That is in stoicism, radical acceptance etc. You do it just because - it's a different animal. "Just because" meaning, you take the power. I'm finding it hard to discuss social hierarchies. They clearly exist. I suspect they have a much greater influence on many things, depression for example (seems to me like a "self own", making oneself lower in the hierarchy, maybe as a survival strategy, but coming with unintended consequences). But people are unwilling to talk about it or get political very fast, because it seems to all hint to https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Might_Is_Right https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Might_Is_Right.
- Funzelunke 5y agoDoes anyone think assholes could be defined by using the "D-Factor"? (dark trait factor) .. and why not getting used to the idea, whenever your IQ is tested your D-factor gets tested as well.....
- tonyedgecombe 5y agoCompanies might well end up selecting for that attribute.
- Applejinx 5y agoEnd up? Seems to me that's always been an aspect of things :)
- eurasiantiger 5y agoAbsolutely. Put a narcissistic sadistic macchiavellist in charge of people, and he will find ways to turn them against each other for fun, while turning a profit for himself by making everyone believe they are not fit for their job and are only allowed to be there by his grace. Essentially, mental slavery.
- denton-scratch 5y agoI was expecting this to be some kind of goatse. Instead, I got a zero-length download with some weird non-standard MIME-type.
- tonyedgecombe 5y agoI didn't downvote but I do tire of seeing archive links under every post. If people wanted them then all they need is a bookmarklet.
- jamil7 5y agoThe post was down for a quite a long time when I commented, I assumed the author's server had fallen over.
- egberts1 5y agoI appreciate archive links beneath original post in case some asshole knocks the site down or an asshole complaining about such a link, or something.
- 0des 5y agoYou don't need to be like that. Be more tired of the reddit-isms creeping in to and derailing gradually more discussions.
- tonyedgecombe 5y agoI'm even more tired of people comparing this place to Reddit when it's nothing like it.
- tomhoward 5y agoThe main link is throwing error 500s. The commenter with the archive link is being helpful to the community. Very uncool to diss them like that.
- xtiansimon 5y agoI originally wanted to respond to say fashioning explanations of offensive language is just tongue-n-cheek and near click bait at best, and confusing at worst. But if you have to write about offensive language, while ignoring its ambiguity and offensiveness, and taking as given the term is a legitimate type, and therefore legitimate topic of discussion, then this article is not the worst. I belive such language is best kept in comedy clubs. That said, having grown up around working class people, the word is unavoidable. And people say it with such conviction, you have to give them the benefit of the doubt at some point that they know an asshole when the see one and that the designation has some utility. Personally, I think I'd like this better if the graphic was accompanied by a scorecard, then you could score your interactions on public forums in a game of Who is the Biggest A$$#0le?
- drcongo 5y agoNice classism.
- posterboy 5y agoYou beat the game, hunnid internet points to you, mate
- xtiansimon 5y agoI can’t take all the credit—I was born into it. (^_^)
- sharadov 5y agoI remember this incident from my 8th grade, this one kid was held back a year, because he failed. He was a typical bully - harassed the kids and teachers, constantly got into trouble. I was a small, skinny kid, the class joker, academically good and in most ways happy go lucky. So, we are giving our tests, and this guy would sit behind me, and would constantly bug me to show the answers. I think, I complied a few times. But one day, I just had it, told him that I would not help. He said, there would be consequences. He caught up with me in the hallway after the test, starts pushing me, there are a bunch of kids. I've always had anger issues, and when pushed too far, I just blow up.I don't remember what happened, but all I know is at some point I was grappling with him, and next his head went straight into the concrete wall. He just collapsed in a heap. That was the last day he messed with me.
- CrownSoft 5y agoWhat is he doing now?
- loldongs1234 5y agohe's a cop, of course...