3 ms·
Just anecdotal/my 2c, My little girl was born in September 2020 in Chicago, USA, she was diagnosed with heart disease, and as it turns out a really rare geneti
by kingsloi 5y ago
Just anecdotal/my 2c,
My little girl was born in September 2020 in Chicago, USA, she was diagnosed with heart disease, and as it turns out a really rare genetic condition. She passed away in May 2021.
My family all live in the UK.
My little girl died without ever meeting her granddad, her aunt, her uncle, etc. I had to livestream her funeral to my family/friends.
Added an additional level of pain and suffering, to an already incredibly terrible situation. I feel immense guilt, for whatever reason. COVID would have likely killed my severely immunocompromised child.
In the speech I read at her funeral, I said:
> For the people who didn’t meet her or spent little time with her. I am sorry. I’m not apologising personally, I’m just acknowledging how terrible it must have been to look but not touch. Some had it better than others. Some only got to see her through a screen. There were no winners in this situation, only losers.
I didn't kiss my child's face until the last week of her life.
I really am burnt out from all this, especially with no end in sight.
edit: I appreciate the condolences/well wishes. I wasn't trying to elicit sympathy, I just wanted to give some insight to someone who had no choice other than to do what was best for their child (or so I thought).
- fortuna86 5y agoI'm so sorry.
- hartator 5y agoMy condolences. It’s so upsetting and sad.
- dabeeeenster 5y agoI'm sorry for your loss, kingsloi.
- Benjamin_Dobell 5y agoI'm sure you've heard it many times before, and words simply don't do it justice. But I am so terribly sorry to hear you had to go through (are going through) that.
- cschep 5y agoWhat a horrible thing to happen to you and your family. </3
- taylortrusty 5y agoI’m so sorry.
- octopoc 5y agoI'm so sorry. Thank you for sharing your story.
- invalidusernam3 5y agoCondolences to you and your family.
- jaimefjorge 5y agoI read this while holding my 1-month-old daughter. I can’t begin to imagine the pain you have endured. I’m very sorry for your loss.
- jlengrand 5y agoThere is not much we can say to alleviate your pain. I just want to say that I am truly sorry for your loss, and can only fathom hoe horrible it is to not only lose a child, but be alone and not be able to share the pain. Take care of all of you and may she rest in peace
- losvedir 5y agoOh no, I'm so sorry. My baby girl was born in Jan 2021, also in Chicago, and I very much remember reading your blog in the days leading up to her birth after another stumbling across it from another comment of yours here on HN. It's a scary time before the birth, moreso during a pandemic, and I was so impressed with your strength and your adorable little girl, it helped me out. I hadn't realized she passed away. I'm so sorry. Know that she and you made a difference in some stranger's life.
- kingsloi 5y agoOh buddy, genuinely, thank you for that. I hope you and your lil family are happy and healthy! I didn't anticipate to share so much of my personal life online, but knowing that someone got something from it, is all worth it for me, so thank you. Talking about my lil girl keeps her very fresh in my mind, especially now as enough time has gone where I'm hazy on certain things. If I can talk about her, and bring awareness to our/the situation, it's a win/win.
- mrcwinn 5y agoI know you were not attempting to elicit sympathy, but I am nevertheless terribly sorry for your loss.
- mig39 5y agoHi Kingsloi. So sorry to hear this. I just wanted to say that I hope time will deal with the pain. You'll always have the memory of her life, and of your love for her.