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Ugh, I also experienced a few panic attacks along with a burnout diagnosis. In my case the trigger was a bug that caused money loss in a customer's website. I
by ratww 5y ago
Ugh, I also experienced a few panic attacks along with a burnout diagnosis.
In my case the trigger was a bug that caused money loss in a customer's website. I had been diagnosed with burnout already, but was freelancing so I could work less hours. Bad idea.
The losses were very small. Even if I were to pay it all by myself it would be less than 10% of the amount the customer owed me (it was a 2 week project), but that didn't stop me from feeling like I had the world on my shoulders. In the end the customer said "whatever" and I didn't even had to pay. Lesson learned.
- noir_lord 5y agoIt's been my experience over the years that with notable exceptions - non-devs are more tolerant of bugs than devs - maybe we trained them too well that all software is shitty but no-one has ever beaten me up as badly over a bug as I do myself. That isn't to say you shouldn't care but it helps to remember that what you view as a giant snow covered mountain with avalanche warnings the customer/client/business sees as a minor molehill. In part I think it's something about the programmer mindset, we like things to be correct, we like things to do exactly what we expect and so it's sand in our gears when it doesn't where in most domains that degree of certainty isn't something you can count on. My partner works in logistics/shipping and the amount of fuckups that occur in that industry every day make the worst software I've used seem positively reliable.
- ratww 5y agoThat's definitely true. The whole ordeal actually uncovered a huge issue with perfectionism I had it due to a less-than-equal upbringing. In therapy I learned to accept it better, to the annoyance of other perfectionists. But boy oh boy if it isn't worth the quality of life.