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I apologize that you find it unhelpful. But for me it is true, and I feel that it's worth saying--I have left at this point probably over a million dollars on t

I apologize that you find it unhelpful. But for me it is true, and I feel that it's worth saying--I have left at this point probably over a million dollars on the table to prioritize enjoying my life and I don't regret it in the least and the overwhelming majority of software developers making The Big Bucks probably can too if they want to prioritize something other than pulling a high score. > It's more like--great I make a ton of money. now that you're here, try to keep it going. Why? Like-so--in the long run, we're all dead. But, unlike many, many working folks in this country and in the world, we are pretty privileged to be able to enjoy a very comfortable life in this industry without worrying that we defer The Good Stuff so far that if we get hit by a bus tomorrow we'll never have had it. Like, I've been there, I've asked myself if twice my total compensation in a pressure cooker would make me happier, and I realized it wouldn't. Maybe you're different. But you also sound pretty unhappy about it, and I just came in from playing fetch with my dog and I'm neither worried about retirement nor about what sort of a shitshow tomorrow will be. YMMV. > There are some success stories, but do we hear of people who left their high paying jobs only to be just as stressed in their new positions? I'm sure that happens. But the whole point is preparation, isn't it? I've picked most of my jobs pretty carefully and after pretty long interview processes (my current one was a quick process because I've never vibed with a place like I do here, but that's an outlier). It means you're interviewing companies as much as you're being interviewed, but that's just fine. I keep a little more in the e-fund than maybe my coworkers do, because there's always the chance that it takes a little longer to find that job. But it's never been a problem for me.

yupper32 5y ago
> Why? Like-so--in the long run, we're all dead. I can retire in 10-15 years, or retire in like 35 years. I think a lot of people are missing this. 10-15 years of grinding and I'm free. Do I want to work until I'm 65, when I have the option not to? Hell no.
- jkhdigital 5y ago
  > Do I want to work until I'm 65 What else are you going to do? If every form of “work” you encounter is just a means to an end, then I guess I can understand. But don’t underestimate how much you might change personally in 10-15 years, and how much enjoyment you might find in the future forms of work you engage with.
  - icedchai 5y ago
    It's not an all or nothing option. You can work part time. Ideal for me would be 2 to 3 days a week.
    - AnIdiotOnTheNet 5y ago
      How? Where? I don't see anyone offering part time work that pays worth a damn and certainly nothing with healthcare.
      - icedchai 5y ago
        You could do contract / freelance work. You’d have to pay healthcare yourself.
        AnIdiotOnTheNet 5y ago
        Part time? Like, really actually part time? Once you factor in all the time finding paying clients?
        icedchai 5y ago
        Probably not. I've had some projects that went on for months, about 20 hours/week. Not recently though.
        eropple 5y ago
        YMMV, but when I was a consultant (which was great in my twenties, I worked three days a week) I mostly partnered with local consultancies who needed specialists in particular fields for this or that. A little staff aug in there too, but again for specialty stuff. They took about a 30% vig all-in-all off the top and they kept me full-up on work as much as I'd wanted.
  - coldtea 5y ago
    >What else are you going to do? Like, live? Or do you believe if you don't passionately "change the world" by working at some BS startup/FAANG you don't really live?
- hnzix 5y ago
  Perhaps consider career downsizing. Work 3 days a week and minimize lifestyle costs. You can be free in 15 years but you'll never be able to buy back your youth.
- Applejinx 5y ago
  You do sound like you're courting burnout. My question would be, to what extent do you HAVE TO. What people are missing (it seems) is that they're not serious, because they don't understand that you HAVE TO, that any other course of action is pretty much impossible. There's your danger sign, right there. It's not even the realistic plausibility of shifting down a gear (and for what? dooming yourself to never be able to run top speed again, who's to say you won't keep doing that, shifting down over and over to no avail, and then be working some shit job at 80 years old, just as miserable, never able to escape?) Did I just do your mental voice there? It's not even the realistic plausibility. It's THAT MENTAL VOICE and the pressure you're putting on, allowing no wavering from the path. I put it to you that it's possible that mental voice is unhealthy and not a reality thing. 'Cos that's the one I had, which is why I can do it on command. But I learned I wasn't being reality-based.
- eropple 5y ago
  I'm 33 right now. If I want to, I'll have the ability to functionally retire (which really means "maybe go do a startup, or consult for companies that interest me", granted, I like what I do) by 50. Because I make spectacularly good money for this country and because I'm moderately careful with my money. And if I drop dead tomorrow? There are things I'll wish I'll have finished, and things that I'll wish that I'd done, but a lot fewer than if I'd locked myself in a closet in my twenties and thirties to "grind". You're talking about "grinding"--you get that that's grinding your psyche and your personality too, right? I'm going to be very blunt with you: do you think, with the attitude you're expressing, do you think you will be a person people want to be around once you're "free"? Because dude. You sound miserable. The journey can be worth it if you can pace yourself. But you've decided destination uber alles, it sounds like, so I can only wish you good luck.
- coldtea 5y ago
  >I think a lot of people are missing this. 10-15 years of grinding and I'm free. One might also die in a couple of years from the big C, heart, covid, even a car accident... So, those 10-15 years might never even arrive...
- tasuki 5y ago
  My guess is that you could retire earlier on a faang compensation.
pram 5y ago
I agree completely. I left at least $200k in RSUs 2 jobs ago because the general atmosphere. At some point I could barely get out of bed the depression was so intense. The day I quit I was literally involuntarily laughing on the way out. Only after did I realize how dark I had become. It’s really not worth it.

yupper32 5y ago

> Why? Like-so--in the long run, we're all dead. I can retire in 10-15 years, or retire in like 35 years. I think a lot of people are missing this. 10-15 years of grinding and I'm free. Do I want to work until I'm 65, when I have the option not to? Hell no.

jkhdigital 5y ago
> Do I want to work until I'm 65 What else are you going to do? If every form of “work” you encounter is just a means to an end, then I guess I can understand. But don’t underestimate how much you might change personally in 10-15 years, and how much enjoyment you might find in the future forms of work you engage with.
- icedchai 5y ago
  It's not an all or nothing option. You can work part time. Ideal for me would be 2 to 3 days a week.
  - AnIdiotOnTheNet 5y ago
    How? Where? I don't see anyone offering part time work that pays worth a damn and certainly nothing with healthcare.
    - icedchai 5y ago
      You could do contract / freelance work. You’d have to pay healthcare yourself.
      - AnIdiotOnTheNet 5y ago
        Part time? Like, really actually part time? Once you factor in all the time finding paying clients?
        icedchai 5y ago
        Probably not. I've had some projects that went on for months, about 20 hours/week. Not recently though.
        eropple 5y ago
        YMMV, but when I was a consultant (which was great in my twenties, I worked three days a week) I mostly partnered with local consultancies who needed specialists in particular fields for this or that. A little staff aug in there too, but again for specialty stuff. They took about a 30% vig all-in-all off the top and they kept me full-up on work as much as I'd wanted.
- coldtea 5y ago
  >What else are you going to do? Like, live? Or do you believe if you don't passionately "change the world" by working at some BS startup/FAANG you don't really live?
hnzix 5y ago
Perhaps consider career downsizing. Work 3 days a week and minimize lifestyle costs. You can be free in 15 years but you'll never be able to buy back your youth.
Applejinx 5y ago
You do sound like you're courting burnout. My question would be, to what extent do you HAVE TO. What people are missing (it seems) is that they're not serious, because they don't understand that you HAVE TO, that any other course of action is pretty much impossible. There's your danger sign, right there. It's not even the realistic plausibility of shifting down a gear (and for what? dooming yourself to never be able to run top speed again, who's to say you won't keep doing that, shifting down over and over to no avail, and then be working some shit job at 80 years old, just as miserable, never able to escape?) Did I just do your mental voice there? It's not even the realistic plausibility. It's THAT MENTAL VOICE and the pressure you're putting on, allowing no wavering from the path. I put it to you that it's possible that mental voice is unhealthy and not a reality thing. 'Cos that's the one I had, which is why I can do it on command. But I learned I wasn't being reality-based.
eropple 5y ago
I'm 33 right now. If I want to, I'll have the ability to functionally retire (which really means "maybe go do a startup, or consult for companies that interest me", granted, I like what I do) by 50. Because I make spectacularly good money for this country and because I'm moderately careful with my money. And if I drop dead tomorrow? There are things I'll wish I'll have finished, and things that I'll wish that I'd done, but a lot fewer than if I'd locked myself in a closet in my twenties and thirties to "grind". You're talking about "grinding"--you get that that's grinding your psyche and your personality too, right? I'm going to be very blunt with you: do you think, with the attitude you're expressing, do you think you will be a person people want to be around once you're "free"? Because dude. You sound miserable. The journey can be worth it if you can pace yourself. But you've decided destination uber alles, it sounds like, so I can only wish you good luck.
coldtea 5y ago
>I think a lot of people are missing this. 10-15 years of grinding and I'm free. One might also die in a couple of years from the big C, heart, covid, even a car accident... So, those 10-15 years might never even arrive...
tasuki 5y ago
My guess is that you could retire earlier on a faang compensation.

pram 5y ago

I agree completely. I left at least $200k in RSUs 2 jobs ago because the general atmosphere. At some point I could barely get out of bed the depression was so intense. The day I quit I was literally involuntarily laughing on the way out. Only after did I realize how dark I had become. It’s really not worth it.