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I never, ever trusted any engineer manager and HR. In my looong experience, they rarely (read never) have at heart the interest of their reports. They are ther

I never, ever trusted any engineer manager and HR. In my looong experience, they rarely (read never) have at heart the interest of their reports. They are there to progress their career, as well as every body else. So, if your promotion, or having you moving to a different team gets in the way, rest assure they will make everything in their power to fight it. Simply put, I don't pay any attention to the things discussed with my manager around my career. I attend my 1-1 because I have to. I honestly don't get any value out of it. I have enough experience to know how to progress my career. There are only two things that keep me working for a given company: - working on interesting projects, making an impact - being payed well enough

webdood90 5y ago
> I attend my 1-1 because I have to. I honestly don't get any value out of it. Yikes, there is a lot more to 1:1s than just talking career progression.
christopherwxyz 5y ago
This sounds incredibly cynical. My experiences have been to the contrary on every point. Great managers do exist, but you have to make sure that you are held accountable as much as they do you. 1:1 time is as much as their job as it is yours to develop a story and convictions in what you need.
- tibiahurried 5y ago
  I don't disagree. But this cynical comment comes as average on decades of experience.
randomanager 5y ago
Who hurt you?
- tibiahurried 5y ago
  haha no one, I am happy as ever Lol, just being honest
Jemaclus 5y ago
> I attend my 1-1 because I have to. I honestly don't get any value out of it. (I'm a director-level with 4 managers under me and 30 engineers total under them, and I've been managing for ~10 years now.) Theoretically, 1:1s are YOUR time (not your manager's) to talk about whatever you think is important. If you're going into 1:1s with nothing to say, then it's wasted time and you might as well not have 1:1s. But this is basically 30-60 minutes of dedicated attention from your manager! This is your chance to bring up any topic that you think is worth talking to them about! Yoou have their undivided attention! What's pissing you off about work? What gets you excited? What are your goals? I always walk into a 1:1 with someone with an agenda in place, but for a report of mine, I let them go first. If they don't have anything to say, then I'll ask questions on their behalf. If they are a high performer, then these questions are often things like "are you happy working on this project?" or "what interests you the most about this project?" or "I've been thinking about this other project that you might enjoy working on." If they are lower performers, then I'll reframe the conversation around how to improve. "It feels like you're struggling with X. Why do you think that is and how can I help?" or "I've noticed you've been committing code less frequently than normal. Is everything okay?" It only becomes a problem if it drags on with no improvement, but this is the first line of defense for us to level up those low performers. For me, a 1:1 is my chance to get to know my employee better, and it's their chance to leverage my skill set, influence, and authority. Are you blocked my some other team? I can help! Are you bored with your projects? I can help! Do you hate this other engineer? I can help! But if they walk into the 1:1 and say "I don't have anything to talk about" and then don't want to play ball with my questions, then there's not a whole lot I can do to help out. I firmly believe that you don't get what you don't ask for, so if you aren't utilizing your 1:1 time with your boss, then your situation is unlikely to improve. My 1:1s with my boss often extend closer to the 60 minute mark weekly. These aren't status updates. If my manager doesn't know what I'm doing on a weekly basis, then either I'm not communicating well or they aren't doing their jobs. This is not a status update meeting. I go into my 1:1s with topics designed to solve problems. "I've got this engineer who is struggling. What advice do you have?" or "I"m frustrated by the slowness of IT to ship laptops to new hires. How can we fix this?" or "In five years, I want your job. How do I get there?" and so on. I've been fortunate in that every boss I've had for the last 10 years has played ball when I say those things. And my most recent boss told the entire org when I left that I was one of his best reports, because I knew what I wanted and I communicated it clearly. He didn't have to guess about whether I was happy or what my goals were -- I knew what they were, and he was able to help me the most out of everyone. This is your chance to level up with your boss's help. If they won't help, then find a new boss. Easier said than done, but having a boss that has your back is invaluable, and the 1:1 is the place to form that relationship. I hope you find a new manager that cares about your career progression, your productivity, and perhaps most importantly, your happiness. There are managers like that out there. I wish you the best of luck going forward.
nly 5y ago
Sometimes your manager is trying to build the kind of career within the company that he or she thinks you want, and not one you actually want. The problem is, if you push back things can go too far in the wrong direction.
shahbaby 5y ago
This is the way

webdood90 5y ago

> I attend my 1-1 because I have to. I honestly don't get any value out of it. Yikes, there is a lot more to 1:1s than just talking career progression.

christopherwxyz 5y ago

This sounds incredibly cynical. My experiences have been to the contrary on every point. Great managers do exist, but you have to make sure that you are held accountable as much as they do you. 1:1 time is as much as their job as it is yours to develop a story and convictions in what you need.

tibiahurried 5y ago
I don't disagree. But this cynical comment comes as average on decades of experience.

randomanager 5y ago

Who hurt you?

tibiahurried 5y ago
haha no one, I am happy as ever Lol, just being honest

Jemaclus 5y ago

> I attend my 1-1 because I have to. I honestly don't get any value out of it. (I'm a director-level with 4 managers under me and 30 engineers total under them, and I've been managing for ~10 years now.) Theoretically, 1:1s are YOUR time (not your manager's) to talk about whatever you think is important. If you're going into 1:1s with nothing to say, then it's wasted time and you might as well not have 1:1s. But this is basically 30-60 minutes of dedicated attention from your manager! This is your chance to bring up any topic that you think is worth talking to them about! Yoou have their undivided attention! What's pissing you off about work? What gets you excited? What are your goals? I always walk into a 1:1 with someone with an agenda in place, but for a report of mine, I let them go first. If they don't have anything to say, then I'll ask questions on their behalf. If they are a high performer, then these questions are often things like "are you happy working on this project?" or "what interests you the most about this project?" or "I've been thinking about this other project that you might enjoy working on." If they are lower performers, then I'll reframe the conversation around how to improve. "It feels like you're struggling with X. Why do you think that is and how can I help?" or "I've noticed you've been committing code less frequently than normal. Is everything okay?" It only becomes a problem if it drags on with no improvement, but this is the first line of defense for us to level up those low performers. For me, a 1:1 is my chance to get to know my employee better, and it's their chance to leverage my skill set, influence, and authority. Are you blocked my some other team? I can help! Are you bored with your projects? I can help! Do you hate this other engineer? I can help! But if they walk into the 1:1 and say "I don't have anything to talk about" and then don't want to play ball with my questions, then there's not a whole lot I can do to help out. I firmly believe that you don't get what you don't ask for, so if you aren't utilizing your 1:1 time with your boss, then your situation is unlikely to improve. My 1:1s with my boss often extend closer to the 60 minute mark weekly. These aren't status updates. If my manager doesn't know what I'm doing on a weekly basis, then either I'm not communicating well or they aren't doing their jobs. This is not a status update meeting. I go into my 1:1s with topics designed to solve problems. "I've got this engineer who is struggling. What advice do you have?" or "I"m frustrated by the slowness of IT to ship laptops to new hires. How can we fix this?" or "In five years, I want your job. How do I get there?" and so on. I've been fortunate in that every boss I've had for the last 10 years has played ball when I say those things. And my most recent boss told the entire org when I left that I was one of his best reports, because I knew what I wanted and I communicated it clearly. He didn't have to guess about whether I was happy or what my goals were -- I knew what they were, and he was able to help me the most out of everyone. This is your chance to level up with your boss's help. If they won't help, then find a new boss. Easier said than done, but having a boss that has your back is invaluable, and the 1:1 is the place to form that relationship. I hope you find a new manager that cares about your career progression, your productivity, and perhaps most importantly, your happiness. There are managers like that out there. I wish you the best of luck going forward.

nly 5y ago

Sometimes your manager is trying to build the kind of career within the company that he or she thinks you want, and not one you actually want. The problem is, if you push back things can go too far in the wrong direction.

shahbaby 5y ago

This is the way