3 ms·

I mean, of course. A lot of the men in the program I went through felt the same way, they would leave after the program back to little hillside towns in TN even

I mean, of course. A lot of the men in the program I went through felt the same way, they would leave after the program back to little hillside towns in TN even and they might make it a few weeks or months before relapsing and doing it all over again. It's just that element of having to stay in one place is what breaks a lot of people down in recovery. You end up back in the same situation as before, with the same places and faces, and there's this insidious thing your brain does that puts your progress out the window and reminds you exactly how you felt and thought when you were last in that situation. It's the same reason residential programs work so well, because you learn to associate the place and faces with the learned behavior and learned coping skills. Programs could improve by teaching the skills necessary to recreate the behavior in new places, that's really what sobriety is all about. How can I make it through today, no matter what happens, without walking into the liquor store? If you KNOW that you can answer that question for yourself, regardless of the place, then you're sober. Otherwise, you're on borrowed time.

ethbr0 5y ago
As someone with addiction experience, a question came to mind while reading this. Horror and evil of this particular example aside. In your opinion, does staying busy help? I suppose (a) in the initial detox, (b) while relearning behaviors, and (c) after one's left a program and returned to "normal" life? On the one hand, idle hands, etc. On the other, it feels like learning to be sober while working 14 hour shifts in chicken processing probably isn't the best pattern to set up for returning to life (and a 40/wk job). Would be interested in any thoughts on the pros or cons. Also, congrats. I've family and friends adding up their own time, and know it's not easy.
- adenozine 5y ago
  In the immediate aftermath of ceasing usage/consumption, yes. Work DOES work in that aspect. I think regularity and disciplined labor can be hugely beneficial, but if they're working for profit, then of course they should be paid their dues. Now, having said that, I can see a case for placing those funds on hold, so that they don't spend unwisely during cessation, or make bad impulse buys. I've known guys who spent their paychecks on dope right after being clean for 18+ mo in a residential. It can go any direction, that's hard to predict. As for relearning behaviors, it's sort of reflective. If I get fired and I'm sitting at the bus stop with no supervision and nowhere to be, and I feel ashamed of myself or inadequate, I mean, that's a recipe for relapse. I grew my skill in reflecting on the ability to choose DURING those events. A few days ago, my best friend from rehab was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer. He's terminal, I went and saw him over the weekend and he looks like walking death. I felt all those crazy feelings and it's like they were all under one big [[you don't have to drink to get through this]] annotation. I can't explain how to just do it, but THATS the skill they're relearning. That's what drugs and alcohol takes away from you until you can get it back. Normal life is honestly the easiest, but can hurt the most. In most of the people I've met and known, it revolves around relationships with their family and loved ones. That's always an individual thing. All I can say is not to rush it, and just make yourself unimaginably patient no matter what. Being busy isn't that important. It might even be less important, because you just need to give your family time to see you grow back into your previous capabilities with your new knowledge and understanding.
lupire 5y ago
People get addicted and homeless in cities too. Residential programs are extremely expensive and rife with abuse and fraud because their income stops if they heal someone.

ethbr0 5y ago

As someone with addiction experience, a question came to mind while reading this. Horror and evil of this particular example aside. In your opinion, does staying busy help? I suppose (a) in the initial detox, (b) while relearning behaviors, and (c) after one's left a program and returned to "normal" life? On the one hand, idle hands, etc. On the other, it feels like learning to be sober while working 14 hour shifts in chicken processing probably isn't the best pattern to set up for returning to life (and a 40/wk job). Would be interested in any thoughts on the pros or cons. Also, congrats. I've family and friends adding up their own time, and know it's not easy.

adenozine 5y ago
In the immediate aftermath of ceasing usage/consumption, yes. Work DOES work in that aspect. I think regularity and disciplined labor can be hugely beneficial, but if they're working for profit, then of course they should be paid their dues. Now, having said that, I can see a case for placing those funds on hold, so that they don't spend unwisely during cessation, or make bad impulse buys. I've known guys who spent their paychecks on dope right after being clean for 18+ mo in a residential. It can go any direction, that's hard to predict. As for relearning behaviors, it's sort of reflective. If I get fired and I'm sitting at the bus stop with no supervision and nowhere to be, and I feel ashamed of myself or inadequate, I mean, that's a recipe for relapse. I grew my skill in reflecting on the ability to choose DURING those events. A few days ago, my best friend from rehab was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer. He's terminal, I went and saw him over the weekend and he looks like walking death. I felt all those crazy feelings and it's like they were all under one big [[you don't have to drink to get through this]] annotation. I can't explain how to just do it, but THATS the skill they're relearning. That's what drugs and alcohol takes away from you until you can get it back. Normal life is honestly the easiest, but can hurt the most. In most of the people I've met and known, it revolves around relationships with their family and loved ones. That's always an individual thing. All I can say is not to rush it, and just make yourself unimaginably patient no matter what. Being busy isn't that important. It might even be less important, because you just need to give your family time to see you grow back into your previous capabilities with your new knowledge and understanding.

lupire 5y ago

People get addicted and homeless in cities too. Residential programs are extremely expensive and rife with abuse and fraud because their income stops if they heal someone.