I noticed a gender dynamic in the crossed communication here as well (and also in HN's mass response to it, but that's another story). But speaking generally, t

I noticed a gender dynamic in the crossed communication here as well (and also in HN's mass response to it, but that's another story). But speaking generally, this kind of thing cuts both ways. A lot of the time "people not working in the tech or science industry" (if that's the euphemism we're using) perceive genuinely well-intentioned remarks as malicious too (e.g. cold, calculating, robotic). Why? Because very little is coming through their primary channel. Each party is relying on a different primary channel and feels like they're not being heard.