5 ms·

I went from being a quite a bad procrastinator to making quite strong progress in running and learning the piano. One of the secrets was setting specific times

by jmfldn 5y ago

I went from being a quite a bad procrastinator to making quite strong progress in running and learning the piano. One of the secrets was setting specific times to do these things such that I can't wriggle out. For example I run on Monday, Wednesday and Friday mornings rather than the more vague "three times a week" which gives wiggle room on a given day. I also set modest goals of two 5ks and one longer run (up to 10k). For piano, I aim for twenty minutes a night minimum, five nights a week minimum after dinner (week nights but sometimes I have to be flexible and drop a weeknight and do a weekend). I won't be an Olympic runner or Mozart but I'm heck of a lot fitter and better at the piano after a surprisingly short amount of time. My 'secrets' are rather boring; schedule specific times, keep it achievable and don't overdo it in the early days. Little and often works wonders and you build the ritual / habit that way. You can then scale the frequency and length of time per session accordingly. Strangely, having kids made me much better at this too. When I had loads of free time I wasted a lot more of it. Now my free time is very limited, it's much more precious.

bradstewart 5y ago
This, plus the discipline to actually do the small, specific thing you said you'd do.
- jmfldn 5y ago
  Yeah true. My discipline isn't great so that's another reason for the modest initial goals. What drives me though is the sheer desire to do it. I don't do it through gritted teeth a lot of the time because I've cultivated the sheer will do learn these things. For the days that the desire is flagging, I have to fall back on grit but not too often. So another secret here is "cultivate your desire to do something" and to that I'd add "try to keep it as fun as possible". Desire is key.
  - bradstewart 5y ago
    Totally agree that modest goals make it easier to get started, get some "little" wins, and help build up steam over time. I guess the point I was trying to make is when you set the specific schedule, convince yourself its not optional. I make the mistake all the time of saying things like "yea I'm going running at 7am tomorrow", but deep down I don't full commit to it.
    - jmfldn 5y ago
      Yeah I'm with you on the 7am thing. I think sometimes you just had to admit that maybe the time doesn't work for you even though you want it to. I can't run without having been awake for at least one hour and being fairly well hydrated etc and I rarely get out of bed before 0630 so I tend to run after the nursery / school drop off. WFH helps here as I can drop kids off and then run, shower and be at my desk for 0900. I'd run at lunchtime at work otherwise if it wasn't for WFH but this also makes it easier.
oldsecondhand 5y ago
What resources are you using for learning the piano?
- jmfldn 5y ago
  I have a friend who's teaching me. I definitely recommend a teacher if you can get one. If not then apps can give you a little taste and take you somewhere for sure. I personally recommend Flowkey.
jmholla 5y ago
I'm a little confused. You mention specific times so you can't wiggle out of them, but your approach to piano sounds like just that. Are you scheduling these sessions ahead of time for each week?
- jmfldn 5y ago
  Yep that's a fair comment! Generally week nights hence five nights. Always after dinner. Edited for clarity!
smoe 5y ago
Pretty much the same is what has worked for me. To add to it, the other thing besides being more explicit about the schedule for me was doing things in the morning before work. Even tough I was never a morning person, this helped me a lot with consistency since I can guarantee to get the time in every day while being more or less in the same physical/mental shape every time. Whereas end of day, I might feel too tired, finishing at different hours, have other things on mind, spontaneously getting asked to go for some social activity with friends, etc.
- a9h74j 5y ago
  I have seen general advice for creatives, and sometimes applied it, that if you want to have a creative day you should more-or-less roll out of bed into that work. You might have some fresh inspiration to follow and not lose. You have the energy. By sleep your mind has been cleared of distractions.
6gvONxR4sf7o 5y ago
I hate this regarding my day job. I don’t have a single day like other days so, setting routines is nearly impossible. Can 10-12 be focus time? Nope. Someone will need to throw a meeting in there. I thrive with routine and structure, but can’t find it at work, which makes things way harder than they need to be.
- adenozine 5y ago
  What kind of skillset do you have? It's not always hard to find a new job. That's not a healthy environment to be working in, imo.
  - deleted 5y ago
    [deleted]
- bcoughlan 5y ago
  I've tackled this by telling everyone that from 9am to 11am I'll be working offline with no IM or e-mail access. Even if the rest of my day is filled with meetings I don't feel too anxious because at least I've least accomplished something in the morning.
- jmfldn 5y ago
  We have this problem to some extent as well, but I've fought back pretty hard with some improvements having been made on my team. We have no meetings on Wednesdays and Fridays and also make as many meetings optional as we can. Time fragmentation and establishing a routine is still a big problem for me at work though. This is the only negative of the WFH experiment I'm finding. Too easy to have meetings when meeting space isn't a factor. I feel like we're working though this at least though so I'm confident we'll get there.
- orev 5y ago
  It’s not foolproof, but if you want 10-12 to work on something, block your calendar so people don’t see an open spot to drop a meeting into. You might get overridden sometimes, but most of the time it will work.
ren_engineer 5y ago
only thing I'd recommend changing is doing it every day, even if it's a very small amount. That makes it easier to keep the habit going. I only workout hard 3 days a week, but I do lighter exercise the other days for maybe 15 minutes because it just seems easier mentally to stay consistent
jlos 5y ago
Low intensity, high volume works so well in so many arenas. As a former guitar teacher this is what I would recommend to students, especially the younger kids: - pick the same time everyday. - just start by playing for 5-10 minutes. Don't do any more. - As the weeks progress and the habit is solid, add 5-7 more minutes. So kid who plays 8min/day x 7 days/ week gets an hour each week, as opposed to the kid who does 25 minutes once or twice and gets bored. Then, when the kids habits are up to 25 minutes a day, they are getting 3 hours a week.
- onetimeacc77 5y ago
  I second this! I found a great way to keep myself fit(let me leave out the gory details on how and why this is working) sooo the secret how to be fit: work out for no longer than 3min but every single day!and work out in a hiit fashion = no pauses in-between, 3min of pure uninterrupted workout _every_ single day! if yo can't get this 3min thing to work you probably won't have the mental capacity/lack the so-much needed self discipline to be successful
  - emerged 5y ago
    I do this for lifting, which I find unbelievably boring. It’s shocking how effective it is, I look more muscular than back when I had the discipline for 3x 40 minute workouts.
    - agustif 5y ago
      But c'mon, literally 3min a day only?
      - ectopod 5y ago
        Not the OP. I do about ten minutes a day but I'm only actually lifting for three of those, and it's made an enormous difference. As an office worker my arms were getting pretty much no exercise. The change from nothing to something is huge!
      - 5y ago
a9h74j 5y ago
If you have not heard them, you might appreciate the old phrases: If you want something done give it to a busy person. And: The busiest person has time for everything.
- bserge 5y ago
  Good way to get rid of that person, that's for sure.
  - a9h74j 5y ago
    Very good point about the first of them. I've heard the second as more of a brag, explaining fluent performance.
hinkley 5y ago
For people down in this well: have to find a rule you will not break, and then apply it. It doesn't matter what the rule is, it just has to be sacrosanct. You establish that it is possible for you to stick to something - anything - and then you start ramping up to rules that are harder but more valuable. Later on, - and this is the important part - when you have a number of different successful habits, you can give yourself permission to skip one of them once in a while without fear of starting a slippery slope. One of my things I was still doing > 85% of the time. It was very hard to give myself permission to not go sometimes, but because it wasn't my One Thing, it worked out fine. Right up until the pandemic hit and every day for the last month or two I can feel how the other things I do aren't making up the difference and I need to get back into it. Except now here comes Delta variant...

by jmfldn 5y ago

bradstewart 5y ago

This, plus the discipline to actually do the small, specific thing you said you'd do.

jmfldn 5y ago
Yeah true. My discipline isn't great so that's another reason for the modest initial goals. What drives me though is the sheer desire to do it. I don't do it through gritted teeth a lot of the time because I've cultivated the sheer will do learn these things. For the days that the desire is flagging, I have to fall back on grit but not too often. So another secret here is "cultivate your desire to do something" and to that I'd add "try to keep it as fun as possible". Desire is key.
- bradstewart 5y ago
  Totally agree that modest goals make it easier to get started, get some "little" wins, and help build up steam over time. I guess the point I was trying to make is when you set the specific schedule, convince yourself its not optional. I make the mistake all the time of saying things like "yea I'm going running at 7am tomorrow", but deep down I don't full commit to it.
  - jmfldn 5y ago
    Yeah I'm with you on the 7am thing. I think sometimes you just had to admit that maybe the time doesn't work for you even though you want it to. I can't run without having been awake for at least one hour and being fairly well hydrated etc and I rarely get out of bed before 0630 so I tend to run after the nursery / school drop off. WFH helps here as I can drop kids off and then run, shower and be at my desk for 0900. I'd run at lunchtime at work otherwise if it wasn't for WFH but this also makes it easier.

oldsecondhand 5y ago

What resources are you using for learning the piano?

jmfldn 5y ago
I have a friend who's teaching me. I definitely recommend a teacher if you can get one. If not then apps can give you a little taste and take you somewhere for sure. I personally recommend Flowkey.

jmholla 5y ago

I'm a little confused. You mention specific times so you can't wiggle out of them, but your approach to piano sounds like just that. Are you scheduling these sessions ahead of time for each week?

jmfldn 5y ago
Yep that's a fair comment! Generally week nights hence five nights. Always after dinner. Edited for clarity!

smoe 5y ago

Pretty much the same is what has worked for me. To add to it, the other thing besides being more explicit about the schedule for me was doing things in the morning before work. Even tough I was never a morning person, this helped me a lot with consistency since I can guarantee to get the time in every day while being more or less in the same physical/mental shape every time. Whereas end of day, I might feel too tired, finishing at different hours, have other things on mind, spontaneously getting asked to go for some social activity with friends, etc.

a9h74j 5y ago
I have seen general advice for creatives, and sometimes applied it, that if you want to have a creative day you should more-or-less roll out of bed into that work. You might have some fresh inspiration to follow and not lose. You have the energy. By sleep your mind has been cleared of distractions.

6gvONxR4sf7o 5y ago

I hate this regarding my day job. I don’t have a single day like other days so, setting routines is nearly impossible. Can 10-12 be focus time? Nope. Someone will need to throw a meeting in there. I thrive with routine and structure, but can’t find it at work, which makes things way harder than they need to be.

adenozine 5y ago
What kind of skillset do you have? It's not always hard to find a new job. That's not a healthy environment to be working in, imo.
- deleted 5y ago
  [deleted]
bcoughlan 5y ago
I've tackled this by telling everyone that from 9am to 11am I'll be working offline with no IM or e-mail access. Even if the rest of my day is filled with meetings I don't feel too anxious because at least I've least accomplished something in the morning.
jmfldn 5y ago
We have this problem to some extent as well, but I've fought back pretty hard with some improvements having been made on my team. We have no meetings on Wednesdays and Fridays and also make as many meetings optional as we can. Time fragmentation and establishing a routine is still a big problem for me at work though. This is the only negative of the WFH experiment I'm finding. Too easy to have meetings when meeting space isn't a factor. I feel like we're working though this at least though so I'm confident we'll get there.
orev 5y ago
It’s not foolproof, but if you want 10-12 to work on something, block your calendar so people don’t see an open spot to drop a meeting into. You might get overridden sometimes, but most of the time it will work.

ren_engineer 5y ago

only thing I'd recommend changing is doing it every day, even if it's a very small amount. That makes it easier to keep the habit going. I only workout hard 3 days a week, but I do lighter exercise the other days for maybe 15 minutes because it just seems easier mentally to stay consistent

jlos 5y ago

Low intensity, high volume works so well in so many arenas. As a former guitar teacher this is what I would recommend to students, especially the younger kids: - pick the same time everyday. - just start by playing for 5-10 minutes. Don't do any more. - As the weeks progress and the habit is solid, add 5-7 more minutes. So kid who plays 8min/day x 7 days/ week gets an hour each week, as opposed to the kid who does 25 minutes once or twice and gets bored. Then, when the kids habits are up to 25 minutes a day, they are getting 3 hours a week.

onetimeacc77 5y ago
I second this! I found a great way to keep myself fit(let me leave out the gory details on how and why this is working) sooo the secret how to be fit: work out for no longer than 3min but every single day!and work out in a hiit fashion = no pauses in-between, 3min of pure uninterrupted workout _every_ single day! if yo can't get this 3min thing to work you probably won't have the mental capacity/lack the so-much needed self discipline to be successful
- emerged 5y ago
  I do this for lifting, which I find unbelievably boring. It’s shocking how effective it is, I look more muscular than back when I had the discipline for 3x 40 minute workouts.
  - agustif 5y ago
    But c'mon, literally 3min a day only?
    - ectopod 5y ago
      Not the OP. I do about ten minutes a day but I'm only actually lifting for three of those, and it's made an enormous difference. As an office worker my arms were getting pretty much no exercise. The change from nothing to something is huge!
    - 5y ago

a9h74j 5y ago

If you have not heard them, you might appreciate the old phrases: If you want something done give it to a busy person. And: The busiest person has time for everything.

bserge 5y ago
Good way to get rid of that person, that's for sure.
- a9h74j 5y ago
  Very good point about the first of them. I've heard the second as more of a brag, explaining fluent performance.

hinkley 5y ago

For people down in this well: have to find a rule you will not break, and then apply it. It doesn't matter what the rule is, it just has to be sacrosanct. You establish that it is possible for you to stick to something - anything - and then you start ramping up to rules that are harder but more valuable. Later on, - and this is the important part - when you have a number of different successful habits, you can give yourself permission to skip one of them once in a while without fear of starting a slippery slope. One of my things I was still doing > 85% of the time. It was very hard to give myself permission to not go sometimes, but because it wasn't my One Thing, it worked out fine. Right up until the pandemic hit and every day for the last month or two I can feel how the other things I do aren't making up the difference and I need to get back into it. Except now here comes Delta variant...