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It's never that you can't, it's that you won't. The distinction means a lot. It takes some luck to realise that all the I-can'ts are actually you trying to esca
by dmos62 5y ago
It's never that you can't, it's that you won't. The distinction means a lot. It takes some luck to realise that all the I-can'ts are actually you trying to escape an internal conflict by putting yourself down. The internal conflict is about you wanting it and not wanting it at the same time. E.g. you want to be a success, but trying is scary. I don't really know how not to be afraid. It's something I'm working on. But, knowing that you're choosing not to do something because you're afraid is so much better than thinking that you're not capable. It's literally the difference between apathy or depression and discomfort.
- JadeNB 5y ago> It's never that you can't, it's that you won't. While this sounds good, and I think is a reasonable guide for many life choices, it's simply not true. If I want to lift that enormous boulder over there, then it's not that I won't, it's that I can't. (Maybe this needs caveats: if I want to lift that enormous boulder over there only using my hands, etc.) I could believe something like "it's never that you can't try, but that you won't try", and that covers a lot of my procrastination; but I'm not sure if it's strong enough to cover the point you'd like to make.
- dmos62 5y agoGood points. What I said applies most obviously to situations like "I can't get out of bed", but I think it also applies to "I can't get this done", but maybe in more subtle ways.