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Every comment so far has been downvoted, I have some internet points to spend. > My first thought was someone had mailed me anthrax. That's your first thought

by bArray 5y ago

Every comment so far has been downvoted, I have some internet points to spend. > My first thought was someone had mailed me anthrax. That's your first thought? The harassment later described sounds insane - if you are receiving death threats call the police, open a case. It'll strengthen your position if you later need to go to court. What you don't do is post about it online, to let your attacker know they were successful. Also, don't doxx your own address. If you need to receive mail and post an address online, there are forwarding services - some even offer to search the mail. I somewhat find the claim incredible though - if you honestly believe you are in immediate danger, most people do something about it. > Most of us, however, experience constant microaggressions. The term 'microaggression' doesn't make sense to me, if it's aggression then call it out as such. If it's not meaningful enough to be called out, then you need a better coping mechanism. > [..] it truly feels like the cancerous misogynistic tumors in our industry in particular run so deep that we may never be able to bisect them all. Either Silicon Valley produces the worst work culture out there (and homelessness), or I would suggest that you find yourself in a bubble. I think as a general rule, if you believe <some group> to have almost entirely evil intent, then you don't understand them or have some internal bias. People generally don't try or believe themselves to be the villains of their own stories. > Listen to and believe women. You go from wanting equality to special treatment. I treat all people with scepticism, but they are innocent until proven guilty. That's how justice works. In general I feel sad for the author. Anything you try hard enough to find, you will eventually find. I hope instead of trying to find sexism in tech industry, the author tries to find happiness.

herschel666 5y ago
Looks like you're the prototype of the spoiled brat that populates the male part of the tech industry. You think when you're able to solve a technical problem, you're able to solve every problem. That's the common combination of arrogance & ignorance so many other dudes are sporting. It got boring long ago.
- bArray 5y ago
  > Looks like you're the prototype of the spoiled brat that populates the male part of the tech industry. If you claim it to be true, it must be. There's no possible way your world view could be wrong. > You think when you're able to solve a technical problem, you're able to solve every problem. Are there any other thoughts you can tell me I hold? There's no need for me to actually express an opinion given you already know how I think. > That's the common combination of arrogance & ignorance so many other dudes are sporting. Arrogance would perhaps be assuming you can determine who I am by hearing just one opinion I hold. As somebody once said: 'It got boring long ago.'
ekager 5y ago
How do you think it would go showing anonymous death threats to the police? I can tell you because we’ve tried! Not well. They laugh you out of the station. You think giving advice to “not doxx yourself” is useful advice? It is not. We are hyper aware of our safety and still have to be afraid of unknown creeps - anonymous trolls who we can’t “do something about”. “I hope instead of trying to find sexism in tech industry” You can’t go 1 week without hearing about sexism in our industry. Being in denial about it because it doesn’t impact you personally is a predictable and weak move.
- deleted 5y ago
  [deleted]
- bArray 5y ago
  > How do you think it would go showing anonymous death threats to the police? I can tell you because we’ve tried! Not well. They laugh you out of the station. There's several reasons for reporting anonymous death threats (even if I find it weird that police would openly laugh in your face): 1. If you need to make a case in the future you have documented evidence. You can bring a police report to court. 2. When statistics are being crunched on such things, having the reports on record help identify a problem. > You think giving advice to “not doxx yourself” is useful advice? It is not. We are hyper aware of our safety and still have to be afraid of unknown creeps - anonymous trolls who we can’t “do something about”. She is publishing under her real name - if death threats are a serious threat, use a pseudo name. I understand the "she shouldn't have to" argument, and in a perfect society no crimes would ever be committed - but unfortunately humans are not perfect and we must compromise our ideology in favour of realism. > You can’t go 1 week without hearing about sexism in our industry. You can't go a day without hearing about murder either, but I don't go hunting it out in the news or writing about it. I pick and choose my battles for my own mental health. I'm not denying sexism in the workplace is a real problem, I'm just suggesting that the author has over burdened herself with a large problem she has little control over, and it's made her unhappy. She sounds as if she genuinely believes somebody will send her anthrax through the post - do you really believe that is a real possibility or do you think her battle with sexism in the workplace has gone slightly off the rails? > Being in denial about it because it doesn’t impact you personally is a predictable and weak move. I'm not denying it's a problem and I haven't suggested that it doesn't impact me personally - you just made these assumptions. It's also not denial to not stress about every problem that impacts you personally.
st3fan 5y ago
This response is 100% victim blaming. There is not a single recognition. No single question. No empathy. It is 100% "it is your fault" and "it is because of your own choices and actions". bArray - you are the problem here.
- bArray 5y ago
  > This response is 100% victim blaming. I lock my front door at night and I imagine you do too. In an ideal society no crime occurs, and we can all leave our doors unlocked at night. In reality - if we can make small changes to our lifestyle to limit our exposure to risk, we tend to do them. But that all rides on the assumption that I accept the designation of 'victim' - I already argued against 'Listen to and believe women'. The author speaks of feeling a very feel threat of an anthrax attack, one that is likely inflated. Based on that, it's not unreasonable to believe that other claims in the article may also be inflated. > bArray - you are the problem here. I do enjoy the classic "if you're not with me, you're against me" argument. It's not at all possible for us both to agree that sexism in the workplace is bad, but have different opinions about how to solve it.
  - dabockster 5y ago
    > It's not at all possible for us both to agree that sexism in the workplace is bad But it is possible to have empathy for others, which clearly you have none of.
    - bArray 5y ago
      > But it is possible to have empathy for others, which clearly you have none of. To show how much empathy I have, I'm going to write a post named "Ask HN: Let's talk about how much empathy I have" [1]. Addressing a few points here: > But with your lack of empathy and obvious lack of respect for original human thought and emotion, I decided to come back and post this. It's not original if a large number of people think in the same way, create bubbles and reinforce preconceived ideas about a subject, it's group think. You then get annoyed because somebody with an actually original thought challenges your own. If you have something to argue then please do, otherwise claiming that I am less than human or lack human traits is not exactly going to progress any conversation. If you assume other people argue in bad faith, there is no way for us to move forwards productively. > What you are doing is hurting people and is holding this industry back. Open discussions are not holding the industry back. Debate is not holding the industry back. It's a lack of these things that hold the industry back - when a woman for example is treated in a sexist manner and people refuse to speak. To push an ideology you must win hearts and minds. Your point here is that you want me to shut-up for the sake of your cause. > Being online behind a username does not give you a pass to treat someone less than human. I don't say anything here I wouldn't say to you in person. The difference would probably be that when I listen to what you say, you'll see that I'm not without empathy, I simply disagree with your opinion. [1] https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=28029434 https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=28029434

by bArray 5y ago

herschel666 5y ago

Looks like you're the prototype of the spoiled brat that populates the male part of the tech industry. You think when you're able to solve a technical problem, you're able to solve every problem. That's the common combination of arrogance & ignorance so many other dudes are sporting. It got boring long ago.

bArray 5y ago
> Looks like you're the prototype of the spoiled brat that populates the male part of the tech industry. If you claim it to be true, it must be. There's no possible way your world view could be wrong. > You think when you're able to solve a technical problem, you're able to solve every problem. Are there any other thoughts you can tell me I hold? There's no need for me to actually express an opinion given you already know how I think. > That's the common combination of arrogance & ignorance so many other dudes are sporting. Arrogance would perhaps be assuming you can determine who I am by hearing just one opinion I hold. As somebody once said: 'It got boring long ago.'

ekager 5y ago

How do you think it would go showing anonymous death threats to the police? I can tell you because we’ve tried! Not well. They laugh you out of the station. You think giving advice to “not doxx yourself” is useful advice? It is not. We are hyper aware of our safety and still have to be afraid of unknown creeps - anonymous trolls who we can’t “do something about”. “I hope instead of trying to find sexism in tech industry” You can’t go 1 week without hearing about sexism in our industry. Being in denial about it because it doesn’t impact you personally is a predictable and weak move.

deleted 5y ago
[deleted]
bArray 5y ago
> How do you think it would go showing anonymous death threats to the police? I can tell you because we’ve tried! Not well. They laugh you out of the station. There's several reasons for reporting anonymous death threats (even if I find it weird that police would openly laugh in your face): 1. If you need to make a case in the future you have documented evidence. You can bring a police report to court. 2. When statistics are being crunched on such things, having the reports on record help identify a problem. > You think giving advice to “not doxx yourself” is useful advice? It is not. We are hyper aware of our safety and still have to be afraid of unknown creeps - anonymous trolls who we can’t “do something about”. She is publishing under her real name - if death threats are a serious threat, use a pseudo name. I understand the "she shouldn't have to" argument, and in a perfect society no crimes would ever be committed - but unfortunately humans are not perfect and we must compromise our ideology in favour of realism. > You can’t go 1 week without hearing about sexism in our industry. You can't go a day without hearing about murder either, but I don't go hunting it out in the news or writing about it. I pick and choose my battles for my own mental health. I'm not denying sexism in the workplace is a real problem, I'm just suggesting that the author has over burdened herself with a large problem she has little control over, and it's made her unhappy. She sounds as if she genuinely believes somebody will send her anthrax through the post - do you really believe that is a real possibility or do you think her battle with sexism in the workplace has gone slightly off the rails? > Being in denial about it because it doesn’t impact you personally is a predictable and weak move. I'm not denying it's a problem and I haven't suggested that it doesn't impact me personally - you just made these assumptions. It's also not denial to not stress about every problem that impacts you personally.

st3fan 5y ago

This response is 100% victim blaming. There is not a single recognition. No single question. No empathy. It is 100% "it is your fault" and "it is because of your own choices and actions". bArray - you are the problem here.

bArray 5y ago
> This response is 100% victim blaming. I lock my front door at night and I imagine you do too. In an ideal society no crime occurs, and we can all leave our doors unlocked at night. In reality - if we can make small changes to our lifestyle to limit our exposure to risk, we tend to do them. But that all rides on the assumption that I accept the designation of 'victim' - I already argued against 'Listen to and believe women'. The author speaks of feeling a very feel threat of an anthrax attack, one that is likely inflated. Based on that, it's not unreasonable to believe that other claims in the article may also be inflated. > bArray - you are the problem here. I do enjoy the classic "if you're not with me, you're against me" argument. It's not at all possible for us both to agree that sexism in the workplace is bad, but have different opinions about how to solve it.
- dabockster 5y ago
  > It's not at all possible for us both to agree that sexism in the workplace is bad But it is possible to have empathy for others, which clearly you have none of.
  - bArray 5y ago
    > But it is possible to have empathy for others, which clearly you have none of. To show how much empathy I have, I'm going to write a post named "Ask HN: Let's talk about how much empathy I have" [1]. Addressing a few points here: > But with your lack of empathy and obvious lack of respect for original human thought and emotion, I decided to come back and post this. It's not original if a large number of people think in the same way, create bubbles and reinforce preconceived ideas about a subject, it's group think. You then get annoyed because somebody with an actually original thought challenges your own. If you have something to argue then please do, otherwise claiming that I am less than human or lack human traits is not exactly going to progress any conversation. If you assume other people argue in bad faith, there is no way for us to move forwards productively. > What you are doing is hurting people and is holding this industry back. Open discussions are not holding the industry back. Debate is not holding the industry back. It's a lack of these things that hold the industry back - when a woman for example is treated in a sexist manner and people refuse to speak. To push an ideology you must win hearts and minds. Your point here is that you want me to shut-up for the sake of your cause. > Being online behind a username does not give you a pass to treat someone less than human. I don't say anything here I wouldn't say to you in person. The difference would probably be that when I listen to what you say, you'll see that I'm not without empathy, I simply disagree with your opinion. [1] https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=28029434 https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=28029434