Having a potluck on my calendar stresses me the hell out, for exactly that reason. And leaders know it. That's why the cultivate the potluck mindset when they

Having a potluck on my calendar stresses me the hell out, for exactly that reason. And leaders know it. That's why the cultivate the potluck mindset when they want to work you to the bone. Everything demands 110% all the time when it's for the sake of your buddies. Of course you'll work Saturday, Sunday, after dinner until midnight. What, are your TV shows more important than your fellows' needs for your labor? You wouldn't want to let your friends down. A little indirection, a little surplus, a little breathing room, is sometimes what makes life worth living. And if I'm feeling more or less ambitious, I can pick a different point on the effort:reward curve. I value that optionality. I don't want to be socially pressured into making the same contribution as everyone else all the time, and I definitely don't want to be pressured into working at my own redline all the time. Sometimes you just microwave some Ramen.