5 ms·
> I've been in academia for awhile, I'm used to getting serious criticism. I'm a man, my whole life I've been told to toughen up. There's really almost nothing
by spywaregorilla 5y ago
> I've been in academia for awhile, I'm used to getting serious criticism. I'm a man, my whole life I've been told to toughen up. There's really almost nothing you can say to me that is going to hurt me. I really mean it.
Tangential but whenever I read something like this, and people do post them a lot, I tend to assume they're actually normal, sensitive people who have learned that not showing any sign of harm means they're not experiencing any harm.
Nothing you can say can hurt me == I have an unhealthy habit of suppressing my negative emotions
- crazy_horse 5y agoHey, wanted to respond to your comment because mine could come off as unhealthy. I simply mean that I'm old enough, have experienced enough that there are very few people in the world that can say something which I haven't already been told or I haven't imagined myself. Some rando on the net can't possibly hurt. But yeah, I don't mean to suggest suppressing your feelings.
- spywaregorilla 5y agoRespectfully I don't really agree that this is a thing. There is an element of discerning that a person is just a jerk, misguided, dumb, or just shitposting without consequence due to anonymity or whatever and learning to disregard their opinions as irrelevant. That is, a lot of internet randos fall into this category. But I also think if people don't trigger a warning as someone worth shunning that their criticism affects us, especially irl.
- fidesomnes 5y ago> I've been in academia for awhile, I'm used to getting serious criticism. I'm a man, my whole life I've been told to toughen up. There's really almost nothing you can say to me that is going to hurt me. I really mean it. All a student has to do is call you racist or touch one and you are fired. Have a nice day "manning up" to that one!
- talentedcoin 5y agoExperiencing a negative emotion is not always, or even most of the time, the same thing as being hurt.
- spywaregorilla 5y agoI think that's going to fall into an argument of semantics. Can you give an example?
- talentedcoin 5y agoI mean, I experience several negative emotions (frustration, anger, etc.) reading the average comment thread on the internet, but to say that I am “hurt” by them would be a grotesque exaggeration …
- rijoja 5y agoThe scientific process leaves no room for emotions what so ever. Errors in the scientific process could have devastating results. If you can not separate your emotional well beings from the truth go and do something where your feelings are of no consequence.
- spywaregorilla 5y agoIf you can't separate "separating emotional well being from the truth" and "acknowledging you have emotions" you should go and take a vacation.
- LocalChapter 5y agoThis isn't true at all. If it is valid criticism of something you have said that is incorrect or have done wrong, the adult way to deal with this is not to get upset but take the criticism on board, improve and move on. If the criticism is nonsense you should disregard it as such and forget about it or in my case laugh at it.
- underseacables 5y agoTo an academic, they are never wrong, you just don’t understand. The more you try to argue will get swatted down as hateful.