Ah, you have not understood. It wasn't even "world class" I was trying for. I never set my sights that high, on anything, as I believe that statistically one

Ah, you have not understood. It wasn't even "world class" I was trying for. I never set my sights that high, on anything, as I believe that statistically one is likely not to be rewarded. I just realized how vast the gap is between where I was and even "middling decent" and, based on my current status and effort expended, realized that I had not been spending my time wisely. Sometimes, you can try hard and just be not very good at something, and it was witnessing his performance which made me understand that "middling decent" might need to be a lifetime pre-occupation to attain, for me.