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Probably the worst thing that could happen to Slack. The second least hip company in the world (#1 is IBM) buying a hip ChatOps platform. Time to move back to I

Probably the worst thing that could happen to Slack. The second least hip company in the world (#1 is IBM) buying a hip ChatOps platform. Time to move back to IRC or go to discord.

dylan604 5y ago
How could you possibly think that with amazing PR jibberish quotes like how they are going to "define the future of enterprise software, creating the digital HQ that enables every organization to deliver customer and employee success from anywhere." Or how they "have a once-in-a-generation opportunity" to "give every company in the world a single source of truth"? /s These types of messages make me want to hurl at the self aggrandizing PR speak. I get positive self image and promotion, but good grief this is so over the top. I want a press release that says something closer to the truth, "we have no idea how to gain more users and the money from their wallets, so we're buying another company so we don't have to worry about developing anything on our own. This was the best idea we could come up with" Not a single quote from anyone from Slack on how they felt it was a good idea and what made it so exciting for them to sell at this time to this buyer. I honestly feel like I need a shower after reading this nonsense.
- ilovecaching 5y ago
  Agreed. Corporate speak like this can't come across as anything but disingenuous, especially when they didn't even make the product they think they're going to "change the world" with. My sister's company recently got acquired, and it's reminded me how bad it feels to be a regular worker suddenly finding out a company you really love is selling out. Of course, the execs get big bonuses while the regular workers get no say in changes to the business including cuts to their bonuses and perks...
- serverholic 5y ago
  I don't understand how anyone can stand that crap. Like what kind of person sees statements like the ones you quoted and thinks it's a good thing?
  - sidlls 5y ago
    People who are paid to write it and their managers.
  - elevatortrim 5y ago
    I thought op made those quotes up and found it hillarious. Then saw they were actual quotes.
    - dylan604 5y ago
      I almost wish I was "clever" or "creative" enough to make up quotes like these, but then I realized in order to do that I'd just be another one of those PR asshole types. I'd rather just not exist than be that. I mean, seriously, WTF is a "single source of truth"?
      - duped 5y ago
        "Single source of truth" is pretty standard jargon in enterprises, at least ime. It refers to the fact that as an organization grows, the same information might be stored in different places in mutually incompatible ways. Ideally you want information to flow from one place that is your "single source of truth" so all systems agree on what data is correct. Otherwise you'll get systems that disagree, which is expensive to mitigate. Salesforce is powerful because they centralize data collected from customer interactions like sales, they're the single source of truth for everything you want to know about your customers (which if you think about it is the most important thing to any business). Integrating chat with slack is an obvious move in that direction, since many people use slack as their primary customer interaction channel these days.
  - remir 5y ago
    I'm sure plenty of folks on LinkedIn would lap it up and click on "thumbs up" or reply "Awesome!".
rchaud 5y ago
The un-hip companies tend to have the most money. In any case, I never saw Slack as a 'cool' app, despite needing to use it at work for several years. I have only ever heard breathless hype about it, and often wonder if I'm using the same Slack as everyone else. Do people really get that excited about having a channel that updates with the status of your Jira tickets?
agloeregrets 5y ago
IBM is definitely more hip. Their CPU arch is called 'POWER', they beat Ken Jennings with a computer, and their CPUs powered game consoles. Salesforce is the worst with Atlassian being a close second.
- polynomial 5y ago
  What are the top complaints about Atlassian?
ProAm 5y ago
To be fair Slack is terrible to use and it probably at it's peak anyhow. Why not exit and let someone else deal with the downhill portion of it's existence?
WJW 5y ago
Salesforce is ahead of Oracle and SAP in non-hipness? How times change. :O (EDIT: Atlassian has got to be up there as well) In any case, most of the world is not very hip but Salesforce does have a very trustworthy aura to most people not in tech. I think Slack being acquired by Salesforce will probably lead to more Slack customers overall, not less.
Nuzzerino 5y ago
Slack still limits searches for free accounts, and charges per user. This basically excludes most community-based use cases. Not very "hip" if you ask me.

Probably the worst thing that could happen to Slack. The second least hip company in the world (#1 is IBM) buying a hip ChatOps platform. Time to move back to IRC or go to discord.

dylan604 5y ago

How could you possibly think that with amazing PR jibberish quotes like how they are going to "define the future of enterprise software, creating the digital HQ that enables every organization to deliver customer and employee success from anywhere." Or how they "have a once-in-a-generation opportunity" to "give every company in the world a single source of truth"? /s These types of messages make me want to hurl at the self aggrandizing PR speak. I get positive self image and promotion, but good grief this is so over the top. I want a press release that says something closer to the truth, "we have no idea how to gain more users and the money from their wallets, so we're buying another company so we don't have to worry about developing anything on our own. This was the best idea we could come up with" Not a single quote from anyone from Slack on how they felt it was a good idea and what made it so exciting for them to sell at this time to this buyer. I honestly feel like I need a shower after reading this nonsense.

ilovecaching 5y ago
Agreed. Corporate speak like this can't come across as anything but disingenuous, especially when they didn't even make the product they think they're going to "change the world" with. My sister's company recently got acquired, and it's reminded me how bad it feels to be a regular worker suddenly finding out a company you really love is selling out. Of course, the execs get big bonuses while the regular workers get no say in changes to the business including cuts to their bonuses and perks...
serverholic 5y ago
I don't understand how anyone can stand that crap. Like what kind of person sees statements like the ones you quoted and thinks it's a good thing?
- sidlls 5y ago
  People who are paid to write it and their managers.
- elevatortrim 5y ago
  I thought op made those quotes up and found it hillarious. Then saw they were actual quotes.
  - dylan604 5y ago
    I almost wish I was "clever" or "creative" enough to make up quotes like these, but then I realized in order to do that I'd just be another one of those PR asshole types. I'd rather just not exist than be that. I mean, seriously, WTF is a "single source of truth"?
    - duped 5y ago
      "Single source of truth" is pretty standard jargon in enterprises, at least ime. It refers to the fact that as an organization grows, the same information might be stored in different places in mutually incompatible ways. Ideally you want information to flow from one place that is your "single source of truth" so all systems agree on what data is correct. Otherwise you'll get systems that disagree, which is expensive to mitigate. Salesforce is powerful because they centralize data collected from customer interactions like sales, they're the single source of truth for everything you want to know about your customers (which if you think about it is the most important thing to any business). Integrating chat with slack is an obvious move in that direction, since many people use slack as their primary customer interaction channel these days.
- remir 5y ago
  I'm sure plenty of folks on LinkedIn would lap it up and click on "thumbs up" or reply "Awesome!".

rchaud 5y ago

The un-hip companies tend to have the most money. In any case, I never saw Slack as a 'cool' app, despite needing to use it at work for several years. I have only ever heard breathless hype about it, and often wonder if I'm using the same Slack as everyone else. Do people really get that excited about having a channel that updates with the status of your Jira tickets?

agloeregrets 5y ago

IBM is definitely more hip. Their CPU arch is called 'POWER', they beat Ken Jennings with a computer, and their CPUs powered game consoles. Salesforce is the worst with Atlassian being a close second.

polynomial 5y ago
What are the top complaints about Atlassian?

ProAm 5y ago

To be fair Slack is terrible to use and it probably at it's peak anyhow. Why not exit and let someone else deal with the downhill portion of it's existence?

WJW 5y ago

Salesforce is ahead of Oracle and SAP in non-hipness? How times change. :O (EDIT: Atlassian has got to be up there as well) In any case, most of the world is not very hip but Salesforce does have a very trustworthy aura to most people not in tech. I think Slack being acquired by Salesforce will probably lead to more Slack customers overall, not less.

Nuzzerino 5y ago

Slack still limits searches for free accounts, and charges per user. This basically excludes most community-based use cases. Not very "hip" if you ask me.