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“I don’t like it” is a child’s statement. It is almost never calculated, and I strongly disagree with the assertion that anyone’s trying to cause discomfort. A
by nkingsy 5y ago
“I don’t like it” is a child’s statement. It is almost never calculated, and I strongly disagree with the assertion that anyone’s trying to cause discomfort.
As someone who has said some really hurtful things, I can’t tell you how much it pains me to have my thoughtlessness mistaken for cruelty.
I recognize it’s not someone else’s job to be understanding of my thoughtlessness, which is why I must employ mindfulness at all times.
I’m also 100% sure that some people come wired for tact, and some don’t.
My son is laser focused on the feelings of others, like my wife, while my daughter is totally oblivious, like me.
- watwut 5y agoI have yet to see anyone classify "I don’t like it” as "brutal honesty". > As someone who has said some really hurtful things, I can’t tell you how much it pains me to have my thoughtlessness mistaken for cruelty. If it was throughtless or innacure, dont call it honesty then. It is not honesty no matter how brutal. And yes, people do say hurtful untrue things on purpose. Or they just say them, but then they insist on them knowing it was throughtless.
- nkingsy 5y agoI'm speaking in the context of tact. When someone is being tactless, they are communicating to achieve a goal without regard for the social implications of said communication. The tactlessness has no relationship with the underlying honesty of the goal, though it makes the communication itself less honest.