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This is spot-on, tbh, and helps communication in many walks of life, but, and this is important: the “with trusted people” is paramount. This sort of conversati

by borski 5y ago

This is spot-on, tbh, and helps communication in many walks of life, but, and this is important: the “with trusted people” is paramount. This sort of conversation requires, as you mention, the assumption that both parties have only the best intent. I’ve run into a lot of people where that is decidedly untrue; they did not have the best intentions in mind. But also, I think this is orthogonal to assertiveness. Sometimes simply learning to say “no” when you’re overwhelmed or too busy, alone, is a great habit to build. How to do it gets easier with time, and how to communicate it does too.

burntwater 5y ago
> I’ve run into a lot of people where that is decidedly untrue; they did not have the best intentions in mind. The manipulative nature of "NVC" is precisely one of my triggers for assuming that someone does not have best intentions in mind. They're out to get something for themselves, and I'm being hoodwinked into agreeing to it.
- mattm 5y ago
  If you view NVC as manipulative, isn't all communication manipulative? Can you give an example of expressing yourself during a conflict that wouldn't be manipulative?