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The social structures are slowly disintagrating because their foundations were weak anyways. Religion and culture only masked it for a while. Everything is tem

by remir 5y ago

The social structures are slowly disintagrating because their foundations were weak anyways. Religion and culture only masked it for a while. Everything is temporary in life and being a parent is a temporary role. A parent's job is to initiate the child to the world, teach them how to navigate it and how to be a functional member of society. In short, the parent's job is to help the child be as independant of them as possible. When the child is an adult, the relationship must evolve. A lot of people fail to understand that, because being a parent is part of their identity. If you take that away from them, they have nothing left because they haven't cultivated anything else. This is a mistake. It is good to see people seek counceling on these issues. It show they have the intention to recognize something is wrong and are willing to put the effort to find resolution.

MeinBlutIstBlau 5y ago
>If you take that away from them, they have nothing left because they haven't cultivated anything else. My parents told me early on "I'm not your friend" and has since then always felt that I should be obligated toward them because they're my parents. These exact parents you mention in your comment are also the exact same ones that can't believe their children don't get along and they don't ever talk to them anymore.
- vageli 5y ago
  > My parents told me early on "I'm not your friend" and has since then always felt that I should be obligated toward them because they're my parents. My parents told me the same when I was young. It wasn't until about age 25 that the dynamic between us radically changed. There is a fine line to cross between being a primary caregiver and being an onlooker to someone's life. If you were a parent for 18 years it is understandable to have some "growing pains" associated with transitioning to a new type of relationship with your kids but it certainly is doable, even if it takes a while. I still seek advice from my parents (and they me) but it does not have the affect of authority as it did in childhood.

by remir 5y ago

MeinBlutIstBlau 5y ago

>If you take that away from them, they have nothing left because they haven't cultivated anything else. My parents told me early on "I'm not your friend" and has since then always felt that I should be obligated toward them because they're my parents. These exact parents you mention in your comment are also the exact same ones that can't believe their children don't get along and they don't ever talk to them anymore.

vageli 5y ago
> My parents told me early on "I'm not your friend" and has since then always felt that I should be obligated toward them because they're my parents. My parents told me the same when I was young. It wasn't until about age 25 that the dynamic between us radically changed. There is a fine line to cross between being a primary caregiver and being an onlooker to someone's life. If you were a parent for 18 years it is understandable to have some "growing pains" associated with transitioning to a new type of relationship with your kids but it certainly is doable, even if it takes a while. I still seek advice from my parents (and they me) but it does not have the affect of authority as it did in childhood.