Agreed. When you are trying to communicate in an empathic/emotional way and the other party does not understand how to do this and defends themselves in an int

Agreed. When you are trying to communicate in an empathic/emotional way and the other party does not understand how to do this and defends themselves in an intellectual/unemotional way, your emotional need is profoundly unmet. This falls short of intentional gaslighting, but to critique the party seeking empathy as childish misses the point.