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Interesting. I think my dad having his own interests and hobbies (cars, woodworking, etc) that he was conspicuously excited about, could teach and share with me
by closeparen 5y ago
Interesting. I think my dad having his own interests and hobbies (cars, woodworking, etc) that he was conspicuously excited about, could teach and share with me in limited ways, etc. was a big part of the person I became and of my relationship with him.
If he had given up those passions to just interact with me 24x7 I think I would have felt a little suffocated.
- AnimalMuppet 5y agoSure. But you can do your interests with your kids, or you can do your interests to escape from your kids. The former worked for you (and me, with my father). The latter I did too often with my kids.
- closeparen 5y agoMost of the time it was an escape. That's why it felt genuine, and not like a pretext for cheesy father-son bonding time, on the occasions when he would invite me to participate. Part of it was riding along to go pick up a tool from Craigslist, but another part of it was him being in the shop for much longer than my attention span, being a craftsman, getting things done, while I understood that this is the kind of person he is, and I aspired to be the same kind of person in my own way on the computer upstairs.