4 ms·
> 5. Keep me safe. > 6. Be kind. I didn't expect to like this article based on the headline, and the fact that the site is basically there to push a product, b
by logifail 5y ago
> 5. Keep me safe.
> 6. Be kind.
I didn't expect to like this article based on the headline, and the fact that the site is basically there to push a product, but in particular these two points jumped out at me.
[Disclosure: we have three kids between 5 and 11...]
We have (only) three rules for our kids. The wording can vary every so slightly depending on the situation but it boils down to:
1. Be safe
2. Be kind
3. _Try and_ do what you're told/asked.
We've always tried to stress that there's a reason rule one _is_ rule one.
A close family friend in his 20s took his own life just before Christmas a couple of years ago. I was with him and his father in the pub one evening, he was telling jokes, less than 24h later his father sent me a message saying he was gone.
So: be safe, and be kind. Everything else is noise.
- senectus1 5y agoI have one more rule in my house. "Making mistakes is allowed and encouraged. provided you recognise the mistake and try to learn from it" I hate seeing kids get paralysed by fear of failure. I want my kids to try and fail, it's the fastest way to learn and succeed.
- CarelessExpert 5y agoI love this! It was this fear that stopped me from learning to ski until I was in my 30s and finally past the stage where I cared about screwing up and looking silly. Since then the joy I've felt on the slopes has been indescribable. So on behalf of those future adults, thank you!
- yosito 5y agoNo judgment at all for how you choose to parent. I just wanted to mention that I was raised with calculated risk taking valued over safety. The Ben Franklin quote "Those who would give up essential liberty, to purchase a little temporary safety, deserve neither liberty nor safety." was often heard in my childhood, as well as the value of taking risks in pursuit of meaningful goals. Not that my family was reckless by any means. I was taught to be safe as a default, be aware of the risks I'm taking, and have the courage to take risks when I understand what they are. This mindset has greatly contributed to my sense of adventure and independence, and has led to some of the best successes of my life. I'm not an unsafe person, but I don't place safety super high on my list of values.
- logifail 5y ago> I just wanted to mention that I was raised with calculated risk taking valued over safety Just to clarify: we're really not talking about absolute safety, our five-year old seems to be routinely covered in bruises incurrent from falling while climbing on things. Last month she had a couple of slightly loose teeth due to landing on her face while falling from (adult) shoulder height at a playground :eek: I'm not sure the kids can process "be safe enough" but that's the intention in the "rule"...