20 or so years ago I was around your age. I'd just been told that the job I'd moved to that city for didn't exist. They had thought twice about it after last t

20 or so years ago I was around your age. I'd just been told that the job I'd moved to that city for didn't exist. They had thought twice about it after last time we talked but they hadn't bothered telling me. I got around $50 in the hand for the hassle. I was almost broke and in a bad condition mentally. At one point I had to cross a rather large bridge with significant potential for jumping as I walked several kilometers back after looking for work. I remember being afraid that I would jump. I was praying but inside I felt so worthless because of past mistakes that I hardly believed it had any effect so I ended up urging $DEITY to listen to my nice Grandma at least because I knew she was praying for us. Point is not if it worked or not but that I was utterly hopeless. My most realistic expectation about the future was that I could hopefully avoid doing anything criminally wrong or very morally wrong. Boy was I wrong. Many people are happy for me today and my life is awesome. Was my life really that bad back then? Maybe not, but depression messes with ones brain.