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Absolutely. You can pickout from someone's words how embedded in "self" they are. The west has nurtured a selfish society; one that isn't just greedy, but that

Absolutely. You can pickout from someone's words how embedded in "self" they are. The west has nurtured a selfish society; one that isn't just greedy, but that is obsessed with "self". We call it individualism, but also express the doctorine through all the words with the self- prefix, where self-actualization may be the most grandiose. But when we embody our "self" we embody our ego. When your ego is fulfilled you are fulfilled. When your ego is hurt you are hurt. When your ego is actualized you are actualized. And we become obsessed with self-this and self-that, with everything pointing inward. But this is your ego taking hold of you. You have no control. You end up trying to pursuade yourself to no avail. Except, there really is nothing inward. So as much as your ego is "there" you can never get to it or "fix" it. The ego itself is void. So when you begin to believe that when all else fails, there has to be something wrong with your "self" or that "you must change" or that the solution is "deep within you", you get sucked into that black hole and you implode. You may turn to drugs to feel better, but you're still stuck with your problem, which is you, in your head. But the moment you externalize your ego and embody your ego-less self, you gain freedom from self, and the freedom you need to begin solving your external problems, of which your ego just becomes one of them. When you tell yourself "I am hungry" who is listening? When you tell yourself "I should go eat" who is speaking? It takes at least two to have a conversation. The needy one is your ego. The other one is you. When people say "pat yourself on your back", they mean pat your ego. And it feels good to the extent that your ego gets the attention it craves. The one doing that patting is you. If you called this self-patting, now you have the template. Self-motivation is you trying to motivate your ego. Forget it. Remove your ego and ask yourself why you can't do something. You're probably tired, unamused, or just don't believe in it. Self-help is you trying to help your ego. Forget it. Remove your ego and just go ask for help if you need it. Etc, etc. Your ego is still there. He'll be there waiting and occasionally bugging you. But to be in control you cannot be him. And there is no changing you through him because there is no changing him because there are no parts to him. All the parts are with you. Like body parts, we have mental parts. We also have moods and states. He is just one of the many parts that makeup what others and you may perceive as you. But none of them are you; the one that lifts the hand to pat your ego on the back. That is the control you have.

aristofun 5y ago
Thank you for detailed explanation, this is very beautiful thinking. Few questions: 1. “The ego itself is void” - how void can feel something, be frustrated etc? If it’s not there - who is suffering, experiencing problems? 2. Who is “I” if not the sum of all parts working together? Take out all the parts including ego - will be there anyone to “fix external problems”? In other words how can we know (verify or at least feel) that your model isn’t just a play of words, while objectively exissting and experienced feelings, issues, dissatisfactions are still there? Or what difference does it make - how we split the cake and how we call our different parts?
- popcornminute2 5y ago
  > If it’s not there - who is suffering, experiencing problems? It's void in the sense that it's a black hole and a black box. You feed it, and it all disappears into a void. Your ego will then ask you to do things to feed it more, but nothing good comes of this. You are simply ego-driven. And in an ego-embodying state, when your ego fails, you fail. Crisis. This crisis is the worst when you cause it. When you realize your ego is an idiot, but still equate it with you, "you" becomes a paradox. > 2. Who is “I” if not the sum of all parts working together? Right. But you're your hand, but your hand is external to the one doing the feeling, thinking, and controlling. You can exist without it. Repeat for every part. Headaches may be the most telling. Literally, your head is hurting. Yet, we swallow a pill and get on with our lives. Once you strip everything away, you're left with an observer that can feel and talk and decide. A stripped consciousness. At this level we may truly all be the same. It is at this level that we must connect. Of course, ego-embodying people connect with their egos. This explains most of the people I've met in the last 20 years through work in Los Angeles. Once you're not an ego booster to them, the relationship is over. But they all use ego-boosting to make relationships and sustain them. They believe that's how they'll make it, when all it is is their ego thirsty for attention and money. Well, the one doing the ego-boosting, the one deciding to do it, and the one okay with it, is the selfless you that can do, decide, and not be okay with the opposite. > that your model isn’t just a play of words It's all words. Or at least, every version of the world exposes itself as (a play of) words. When I see someone reasoning with self- words, I see them playing with fire, and I can easily fix their expressions to be less egocentric. Usually it makes them feel better too. It's semantic surgery and semantic therapy. You hear a pessimist and if you're an optimist, you know right away how unnecessary some of their framing of the world can be. It's all in our words. > what difference does it make - how we split the cake and how we call our different parts We can split it however we see fit, but it makes all the difference. If you identify with your ego, you'll live one way. If you identify your ego as a needy pesky pet that lives in your mind that requires occassional feeding, you'll live another way. The ego serves a purpose. It can make you feel really really good. It's tenticales stretch into our nervous system. It rewards us for our successes and punishes us for our failures. Or at least tries to. Kids are all one with their egos. It's with maturity that we learn detachement and transcendence. That's when we stop taking everything so personally and decide it's not okay to let our ego do the driving. But when you have the entire western culture obsessed with individualism, too many of us have become intellectually engrossed in ego-driven self-worship. We then attach our egos to group identities and go to war with them. To facebook and twitter. And that needs to be called out for exactly what it is: Immature.

aristofun 5y ago

Thank you for detailed explanation, this is very beautiful thinking. Few questions: 1. “The ego itself is void” - how void can feel something, be frustrated etc? If it’s not there - who is suffering, experiencing problems? 2. Who is “I” if not the sum of all parts working together? Take out all the parts including ego - will be there anyone to “fix external problems”? In other words how can we know (verify or at least feel) that your model isn’t just a play of words, while objectively exissting and experienced feelings, issues, dissatisfactions are still there? Or what difference does it make - how we split the cake and how we call our different parts?

popcornminute2 5y ago
> If it’s not there - who is suffering, experiencing problems? It's void in the sense that it's a black hole and a black box. You feed it, and it all disappears into a void. Your ego will then ask you to do things to feed it more, but nothing good comes of this. You are simply ego-driven. And in an ego-embodying state, when your ego fails, you fail. Crisis. This crisis is the worst when you cause it. When you realize your ego is an idiot, but still equate it with you, "you" becomes a paradox. > 2. Who is “I” if not the sum of all parts working together? Right. But you're your hand, but your hand is external to the one doing the feeling, thinking, and controlling. You can exist without it. Repeat for every part. Headaches may be the most telling. Literally, your head is hurting. Yet, we swallow a pill and get on with our lives. Once you strip everything away, you're left with an observer that can feel and talk and decide. A stripped consciousness. At this level we may truly all be the same. It is at this level that we must connect. Of course, ego-embodying people connect with their egos. This explains most of the people I've met in the last 20 years through work in Los Angeles. Once you're not an ego booster to them, the relationship is over. But they all use ego-boosting to make relationships and sustain them. They believe that's how they'll make it, when all it is is their ego thirsty for attention and money. Well, the one doing the ego-boosting, the one deciding to do it, and the one okay with it, is the selfless you that can do, decide, and not be okay with the opposite. > that your model isn’t just a play of words It's all words. Or at least, every version of the world exposes itself as (a play of) words. When I see someone reasoning with self- words, I see them playing with fire, and I can easily fix their expressions to be less egocentric. Usually it makes them feel better too. It's semantic surgery and semantic therapy. You hear a pessimist and if you're an optimist, you know right away how unnecessary some of their framing of the world can be. It's all in our words. > what difference does it make - how we split the cake and how we call our different parts We can split it however we see fit, but it makes all the difference. If you identify with your ego, you'll live one way. If you identify your ego as a needy pesky pet that lives in your mind that requires occassional feeding, you'll live another way. The ego serves a purpose. It can make you feel really really good. It's tenticales stretch into our nervous system. It rewards us for our successes and punishes us for our failures. Or at least tries to. Kids are all one with their egos. It's with maturity that we learn detachement and transcendence. That's when we stop taking everything so personally and decide it's not okay to let our ego do the driving. But when you have the entire western culture obsessed with individualism, too many of us have become intellectually engrossed in ego-driven self-worship. We then attach our egos to group identities and go to war with them. To facebook and twitter. And that needs to be called out for exactly what it is: Immature.