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Realise that people can be super nice to you and cruel/evil to somebody else. The serial killer living next door might be a great neighbour. That doesn’t change

Realise that people can be super nice to you and cruel/evil to somebody else. The serial killer living next door might be a great neighbour. That doesn’t change the facts of what he/she is.

3grdlurker 5y ago
This kind of subjectivism is so lacking in nuance, though, that the good parts that one is seeing (and, in many ways, choosing to see) are a mere reduction of the whole truth, and isn’t the whole truth of a person So a serial killer is a good person just because he’s a nice neighbor to you? If you’re hanging out with a friend in your inner circle of elites and that friend is nice to you but is very rude to waiters and other blue-collar workers, is that friend a good person? I’m not making a judgment of McAfee’s character here, just pointing out the myopic sense of morality. It’s so popular, too popular if I must say, among people these days.
- duxup 5y ago
  >So a serial killer is a good person just because he’s a nice neighbor to you? I don't think that is what the person you responded to was saying. Quite the opposite.
- mbrodersen 5y ago
  Nope that’s not my point at all. Quite the opposite.
beezle 5y ago
Watch 'The Fall' mini-series for a good example
- Koiwai 5y ago
  Are you sure you want to use a fictional story as an example？
  - antupis 5y ago
    There is plenty IRL examples eg BTK https://abcnews.go.com/US/btk-serial-killers-daughter-living-normal-life-upended/story?id=60428529 https://abcnews.go.com/US/btk-serial-killers-daughter-living...
    - ryan-allen 5y ago
      And Gacy, he had a fantastic reputation as an upstanding community member for years before his atrocities were discovered.
    - Koiwai 5y ago
      I'm not saying I do not agree to the point he's trying to prove, it's just the material he used I'm against, please understand the difference.
- quickthrower2 5y ago
  The hidden monster seeming like an ordinary and somewhat charming person is a common plot.
- spoonjim 5y ago
  I think the word you're looking for is not "example" but "illustration."
Gene_Parmesan 5y ago
In fact, this is what they mean when they say it's almost impossible to know who the real sociopaths are. The true ones are so charismatic and good at manipulation that, unless you are extraordinarily close to them or get on their bad side, they just seem like the sort of person that everyone likes. Interestingly, a minority of people seem to be somewhat able to see through the facade. I have ADHD and a brother who's very nearly on the autism spectrum, and both of those conditions seem correlated with this ability to have an unbiased sense of a person. Perhaps it's due to the way we are slightly detached from normal social interactions, or the highly analytical way our brains function. All I know is that there are definitely times I feel this. For instance, if you look online, there are tons of relatively recent videos that have special forces types (SEALS, rangers, etc.) commenting on movie scenes or so on. The comments are always full of people talking about how they seem like such a great person, or how funny/charming/positive/etc. this person is. Meanwhile, I just come away with this feeling of being very deeply unsettled by them almost every time. Everything about their demeanor unsettles me. Now I'm in no way saying every special forces operator is a closet sociopath. But the job does attract a certain personality type, and many of the ones on these videos are the most charismatic of the whole bunch. Back on topic, John always seemed to be to be a pretty typical narcissist to me. He did some stuff that I found to be funny in kind of a black humor sense (that video of him supposedly telling you how to uninstall McAfee antivirus), but the idea that he was a truly positive person I just totally don't see. I mean, think about it -- the OP's story involves John having the guy call his wife and tell him how great he thought John was and how great his ideas were. That's pretty typical narcissistic behavior.
- bserge 5y ago
  It's a slippery slope tbh, you can end up suspicious of everyone, thinking everyone nice is actually a sociopath, when in fact there's nothing sinister under the surface. Not to mention that people on the spectrum who are trying hard to show emotions appropriate to a situation end up seeming just as unsettling.
- belter 5y ago
  Always though ADHD was not about being able to have unbiased sense of a person. Instead much more about the inability to interact and be perceptive about the world and persons around you.
karlmrax 5y ago
Are you comparing John McAfee to a serial killer? For real?
- mbrodersen 5y ago
  Of course not. I was using an example to illustrate my point.

Realise that people can be super nice to you and cruel/evil to somebody else. The serial killer living next door might be a great neighbour. That doesn’t change the facts of what he/she is.

3grdlurker 5y ago

This kind of subjectivism is so lacking in nuance, though, that the good parts that one is seeing (and, in many ways, choosing to see) are a mere reduction of the whole truth, and isn’t the whole truth of a person So a serial killer is a good person just because he’s a nice neighbor to you? If you’re hanging out with a friend in your inner circle of elites and that friend is nice to you but is very rude to waiters and other blue-collar workers, is that friend a good person? I’m not making a judgment of McAfee’s character here, just pointing out the myopic sense of morality. It’s so popular, too popular if I must say, among people these days.

duxup 5y ago
>So a serial killer is a good person just because he’s a nice neighbor to you? I don't think that is what the person you responded to was saying. Quite the opposite.
mbrodersen 5y ago
Nope that’s not my point at all. Quite the opposite.

beezle 5y ago

Watch 'The Fall' mini-series for a good example

Koiwai 5y ago
Are you sure you want to use a fictional story as an example？
- antupis 5y ago
  There is plenty IRL examples eg BTK https://abcnews.go.com/US/btk-serial-killers-daughter-living-normal-life-upended/story?id=60428529 https://abcnews.go.com/US/btk-serial-killers-daughter-living...
  - ryan-allen 5y ago
    And Gacy, he had a fantastic reputation as an upstanding community member for years before his atrocities were discovered.
  - Koiwai 5y ago
    I'm not saying I do not agree to the point he's trying to prove, it's just the material he used I'm against, please understand the difference.
quickthrower2 5y ago
The hidden monster seeming like an ordinary and somewhat charming person is a common plot.
spoonjim 5y ago
I think the word you're looking for is not "example" but "illustration."

Gene_Parmesan 5y ago

In fact, this is what they mean when they say it's almost impossible to know who the real sociopaths are. The true ones are so charismatic and good at manipulation that, unless you are extraordinarily close to them or get on their bad side, they just seem like the sort of person that everyone likes. Interestingly, a minority of people seem to be somewhat able to see through the facade. I have ADHD and a brother who's very nearly on the autism spectrum, and both of those conditions seem correlated with this ability to have an unbiased sense of a person. Perhaps it's due to the way we are slightly detached from normal social interactions, or the highly analytical way our brains function. All I know is that there are definitely times I feel this. For instance, if you look online, there are tons of relatively recent videos that have special forces types (SEALS, rangers, etc.) commenting on movie scenes or so on. The comments are always full of people talking about how they seem like such a great person, or how funny/charming/positive/etc. this person is. Meanwhile, I just come away with this feeling of being very deeply unsettled by them almost every time. Everything about their demeanor unsettles me. Now I'm in no way saying every special forces operator is a closet sociopath. But the job does attract a certain personality type, and many of the ones on these videos are the most charismatic of the whole bunch. Back on topic, John always seemed to be to be a pretty typical narcissist to me. He did some stuff that I found to be funny in kind of a black humor sense (that video of him supposedly telling you how to uninstall McAfee antivirus), but the idea that he was a truly positive person I just totally don't see. I mean, think about it -- the OP's story involves John having the guy call his wife and tell him how great he thought John was and how great his ideas were. That's pretty typical narcissistic behavior.

bserge 5y ago
It's a slippery slope tbh, you can end up suspicious of everyone, thinking everyone nice is actually a sociopath, when in fact there's nothing sinister under the surface. Not to mention that people on the spectrum who are trying hard to show emotions appropriate to a situation end up seeming just as unsettling.
belter 5y ago
Always though ADHD was not about being able to have unbiased sense of a person. Instead much more about the inability to interact and be perceptive about the world and persons around you.

karlmrax 5y ago

Are you comparing John McAfee to a serial killer? For real?

mbrodersen 5y ago
Of course not. I was using an example to illustrate my point.