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In the spirit of rifting and drifting... If you're losing friends over shifting position about science, economics or somesuch then you're doing it wrong. I've

In the spirit of rifting and drifting... If you're losing friends over shifting position about science, economics or somesuch then you're doing it wrong. I've maintained close friendships to people who've gone literal flat-earth for several year spans. It's not the content that drives rifts, it's delivery. After work bar chats with friends are even better when the friends disagree, I find. If you can't hold a pleasant adversarial conversation, I reckon you can't be good at skepticism. The two are linked.

whatshisface 5y ago
I think you're assuming that his delivery was wrong, when in fact it's quite likely that a group formed over shared opinions would have some fairly proactive ideological policing.
- dalbasal 5y ago
  Key word is "friends."
briefcomment 5y ago
The key is humility. By accepting there's a possibility you are wrong and letting others know, you can get away with most beliefs.
desine 5y ago
I agree with your statements. But it's not that I am shunned from the group, it's that some have self-shunned. What was a batch of friends that could fill a backyard BBQ with 30+ people is down to about 10. I'm still the most left field of the bunch. There's still a literal communist (which I find abhorrent) that I love and see at least once a month. But there's also a bunch of people I really enjoyed hanging out with that I now only see rarely, and definitely not when I host an event.
- spfzero 5y ago
  I think what you may be onto there, is that some of those people were not really your friends, in the sense you thought they were. The ones that don't come over anymore are the ones that think about it and decide they don't want to see you bad enough to take the time. Doesn't mean they hate or despise you. They may still consider themselves your friend, but they're not, at least in the way you had thought. Ten loyal friends is a big number :-)

whatshisface 5y ago

I think you're assuming that his delivery was wrong, when in fact it's quite likely that a group formed over shared opinions would have some fairly proactive ideological policing.

dalbasal 5y ago
Key word is "friends."

briefcomment 5y ago

The key is humility. By accepting there's a possibility you are wrong and letting others know, you can get away with most beliefs.

desine 5y ago

I agree with your statements. But it's not that I am shunned from the group, it's that some have self-shunned. What was a batch of friends that could fill a backyard BBQ with 30+ people is down to about 10. I'm still the most left field of the bunch. There's still a literal communist (which I find abhorrent) that I love and see at least once a month. But there's also a bunch of people I really enjoyed hanging out with that I now only see rarely, and definitely not when I host an event.

spfzero 5y ago
I think what you may be onto there, is that some of those people were not really your friends, in the sense you thought they were. The ones that don't come over anymore are the ones that think about it and decide they don't want to see you bad enough to take the time. Doesn't mean they hate or despise you. They may still consider themselves your friend, but they're not, at least in the way you had thought. Ten loyal friends is a big number :-)