There's a spectrum. I only listed 2 options. One end is living at home with a faang job. The other is them living on cap hill with around 3800 / month expenses

There's a spectrum. I only listed 2 options. One end is living at home with a faang job. The other is them living on cap hill with around 3800 / month expenses and the 58k income you mentioned. The 3800 is her estimate which checks out. There are obviously many more options in the decision matrix but this is a HN post :)