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I had a wedding to make sure everyone closest to me knew who I was sleeping with (Emily as is already public record). It took a fair bit of time and money to co

I had a wedding to make sure everyone closest to me knew who I was sleeping with (Emily as is already public record). It took a fair bit of time and money to coordinate and hold that event. When people ask how I'm doing, I tell them and that includes whether my problems are impacting my daily routines and needs. (Not lately) I've shared the results of my IQ tests and had plenty of discussions about the validity and lack thereof of those results (145-160+ depending on test). Facebook likes are the least good mechanism to work that out by. I think one of the helpful things I do is share really good places to eat and find things I want. (Nirmal's is my favorite in Seattle) I hope driving monitoring helps us shift from a penalize infrequent rule breaking instances to helping manage attention and grow skill. I speed when conditions let that be safe. I suffer depression and have my whole life as everyone I know is aware and now is more public on the internet. You'll have to ask her but I'm not looking to leave. I'm very honest and want that in my closest relationships so if we were going that direction she'd be among the first people I spoke with. If she feels she needs to leave I'll try and help us both find happier lives but I hope it never comes to that. I respect that you have a different level of openness. I think a good criticism of my post is that I have a ton of privilege to feel safe sharing these things. I've chosen to live a life I feel entirely comfortable sharing. Clearly I'm not handing out credentials but... I prefer a world that is more honest and intimate and that simply requires I be open, honest, and self-reflective.

throway98752343 5y ago
Good of you to offer concrete examples. I don't mean these as ad hominems since I don't know you, more as counter examples: > I've shared the results of my IQ tests (145-160+) I wonder if the part of the population with <100 IQs are similarly open with their results. > I speed when conditions let that be safe. Admitting to breaking the law is an excuse for higher insurance premiums and for the police to hassle you. > I suffer depression This is one of the few relatively "safe" mental health conditions to announce. Who's lining up to hire someone who's openly struggling with addiction or has psychopathy? > I'm very honest and want that in my closest relationships Let's say your partner gets served ads about how your single, attractive co-worker has been googling you late at night, how your location histories have significant overlap, and by clicking the ad they can find out more. Not everyone will get suspicious, but some people definitely will click. ~~~ It would be great if we could all be open like you say you are, but society isn't even close to ready for that. Any rapid transition (like wide-scale encryption breaks) would be traumatic on so many levels.
- erikerikson 5y ago
  You have my gratitude for this comment. I don't take it as ad hominem at all but rather excellent challenges and realities that move the conversation forward. These are good examples of the privilege I mentioned and I appreciate them being raised. I agree that there is a long way to go before pervasive feelings of safety will exist. You also seem right that the transition, if we choose it, will more positively be consensual and gradual. This conversation seems to be often spoken of with binary models. Further, the preference clusters are implied to be in opposition so I hoped to offer a counter to that in case it might have a positive effect over the long term.

throway98752343 5y ago

Good of you to offer concrete examples. I don't mean these as ad hominems since I don't know you, more as counter examples: > I've shared the results of my IQ tests (145-160+) I wonder if the part of the population with <100 IQs are similarly open with their results. > I speed when conditions let that be safe. Admitting to breaking the law is an excuse for higher insurance premiums and for the police to hassle you. > I suffer depression This is one of the few relatively "safe" mental health conditions to announce. Who's lining up to hire someone who's openly struggling with addiction or has psychopathy? > I'm very honest and want that in my closest relationships Let's say your partner gets served ads about how your single, attractive co-worker has been googling you late at night, how your location histories have significant overlap, and by clicking the ad they can find out more. Not everyone will get suspicious, but some people definitely will click. ~~~ It would be great if we could all be open like you say you are, but society isn't even close to ready for that. Any rapid transition (like wide-scale encryption breaks) would be traumatic on so many levels.

erikerikson 5y ago
You have my gratitude for this comment. I don't take it as ad hominem at all but rather excellent challenges and realities that move the conversation forward. These are good examples of the privilege I mentioned and I appreciate them being raised. I agree that there is a long way to go before pervasive feelings of safety will exist. You also seem right that the transition, if we choose it, will more positively be consensual and gradual. This conversation seems to be often spoken of with binary models. Further, the preference clusters are implied to be in opposition so I hoped to offer a counter to that in case it might have a positive effect over the long term.