That is a good observation. Nothing so bad for me (except 15 years battling) but I had always assumed everyone with a higher education was more or less decent,

That is a good observation. Nothing so bad for me (except 15 years battling) but I had always assumed everyone with a higher education was more or less decent, until my breakup at 23. I’m 38. The violence of it stunned me. And the worst violence, is that everyone is fine with what women do to men at breakup - when the same people would be up in arms if a male were a “pervert narcissist” telling truths in a vexating way, while they don’t mind that my girlfriend asked me to move to another country only to dump me there without notice, without remotely thinking that I would be homeless for 3 days and it was winter, and would be too disoriented to recover abroad or to choose to come back. I know, expecting people who say “I love you” to mildly care for you after breakup is a childish expectation. I… I didn’t know. I had been fed popular songs usually saying “We broke up but I wish you the best”. I didn’t know someone who loved me could suddenly make me homeless because I wasn’t pleasing her in bed anymore. This is violent. And society is fine with that, and people don’t tell that normal girls might do that, while they warn all the time about pervert narcisssists. For 15 years I oscillated between good person, gay, misogynist, or worse, and cut ties with 98% of my friends and all my family. But clearly, my mental model of people’s interactions is a swamp: I both understand nothing of why people are unnecessarily mean gratuitously, and both understand very clearly that we are pieces of meat. I could now strangle kittens without any feeling right now, and yet I don’t do that and still donate to charities, because I try to believe in a world of decent people. Which the world clearly is not. My mental model is a swamp, this is correct. Sorry for going out of topic.