I'm very sorry for your loss. Just over five years ago, I lost my wife of 10 years at the age of 36 to pancreatic cancer. She went from seemingly perfectly hea

I'm very sorry for your loss. Just over five years ago, I lost my wife of 10 years at the age of 36 to pancreatic cancer. She went from seemingly perfectly healthy, athletic even, to deathly ill and passing inside of six months. It wasn't fair, and in fact was completely tragic because of the person that she was. Mirroring some advice already here: don't be afraid to cry, to feel. You have to. You also have to reconcile now with any regrets, either to decide that you really don't have them, or to think about how to change your life going forward so as to not create new ones. But the cold, hard fact is that this is reality, both the thing that happened but also that it happens and will continue to happen. I hope this doesn't sound cold. For me, it was more of a question of "ok, this is reality... now what?" And I recognize that different people react differently, and circumstances of deaths are very different, too. I also found myself blogging both for therapy as well as just to connect to all the friends and family out there who shared my tragedy. Maybe something there will be useful to you, too: https://justinmiller.io/series/grief/ https://justinmiller.io/series/grief/ Be well.