I suspect you're tripping on the flowers of the carpet. Telemetry here is not a word meaning "call home and report user data", it means "telemetry" in the sense

I suspect you're tripping on the flowers of the carpet. Telemetry here is not a word meaning "call home and report user data", it means "telemetry" in the sense that a Mars rover sends back positioning & orientation data back to NASA for control. The usage of this tool is equivalent to having a query engine for application logs, or a statsd server to render graphs. It's just a protocol to see how systems are performing, but a better one than statsd or logs.